Maybe in some future version of this some of the women can have events in parks to feed some of the kids who rely on school lunch as a good part of their nutrition. Our schools will be open here, but if they weren’t, the girl who lives upstairs from me might not get lunch.

Also why.do lesbians have so many God damn opinions about everything??

Well I’ve had sex with HUNDREDS of women and never brought one to orgasm. I don’t understand why; I have a huge cock. What was this article about again?

Including at the drive in as part of your joke that “ha ha these are bands you’ve never heard of because you’re old” kind of ruins the joke. Funny joke though.

Haha you think he can feel shame! That’s rich!

Came here hoping to see this joke

How about pro-clothes-hanger-abortion?

OH. OH. Imagine the OUTRAGE if there were monuments honoring WHITE PEOPLE!

I like fucking this guy.

I think that joke warrants a slice of cherry pie.

My seven year old came up behind me and said “why is this on gizmodo? I thought that was a technology website”

See ya there. I did the same thing. (Though I didn’t know misreading headlines was a sin)

They’re not fighting to fight. They’re fighting to win at something which takes effort and also to get fucking paid a shit ton of money to do it.

If we’re being reasonable human beings we can both be right, but if we’re being pedantic only I am.

Hello, I’m That Guy. They’re homophones, not homonyms.

That’s better than my idea, which was to have them write “Happy Holidays” on my cup. Making it explicitly pagan is a definite improvement. I want to find a barista willing to write “there is no god.”

Is Target going to start putting up ads telling California what to do with all the sales tax it collects?

That’s why you wear them to the grocery store and the post office as well.

Being drunk at Starbucks is awesome if you’re sneaking off to the bathroom to drink cheap rum out of a flask while nursing frappaccinos and writing papers for loathesome college classes in modernism.

They used a machine translator. My guess is there is a Portuguese word that can be translated as “wear” or “consume/take”.