Just wear a fanny pack.

I’ve never had a problem opening a banana from the end which has a convenient handle for opening.

This article is like telling people not to “talk black” or “sound gay”. There are natural variations in the way people speak, and it’s the judgers who need to change, not the ones being judged.

Haha rape is funny haha! Haha and I get it! Girls drink cosmos haha!

Yeah I don’t care if it’s available or not. None of my business.

I see that the drug is supposed to have a modest effect, but I still wonder how many men are going to pressure their women into taking this stuff only to find out they can’t keep up.

Whatever happened to obsessively poring over interviews and reviews to find out what influences your favorite artists? Also get off my lawn.

Well look. If I want to modify a noun with a damn noun, then you very well better believe I am going to not even be so damn as to what like person who has ever been so far as to ok?

Tell me you’re trolling.

What the fuck are you on about?

It’s the pain of knowing she’ll never have an orgasm.

I am really envious of your ability to hate-read books. I have a hard time finishing books I like.

Somebody mentioned snake plant already. Peace lilies are easy to care for, but you have to force them to bloom. Spider plants are mostly unkillable. The ficus and most likely all the palms (though I’m not familiar with all of them) need a really good source of light, but not immediately in front of a south or west…

It’s funny when my wife send me a picture of her titties but I find out later that she meant to send them to another dude.

As an asperger person, if you invite me to the bar with you, you’re going to have a barnacle all night.

Haha. That’s almost a decade ago! When a decade seems like yesterday, you’re OLD. and yes, I’m OLD.

You remind me of Michael Douglas' character in the film Falling Down.

yeah, it's kind of a really stupid insignificant thing to make a fucking stand about. The crack of your voice as your psyche nearly broke over a sticker is probably what caused your barista to get a little snippy and short with you.

I clicked on "28.8 RealVideo" at the interview hoping that I'd get some internet video nostalgia.

same way she fell for your bullshit.