The one where Kevin Draper was the saddest.

There there, Speaker Boehner. It's just the booze.

That’s a lot of tears. Hopefully he has some kind of hollow, cylindrical device on hand to transport all that liquid.

Meanwhile...

Your Copa América semifinalists:

Yeah, Diablo 2 started great and got better. Diablo 3 had to be reverse engineered into an actual game because the market place scheme to milk money out of the consumers just to get basic gear backfired on them.

I decided to play this game now that its optimized for modern computers. God this game is still great 16 years later. Really makes me sad about how shitty Diablo III was.

That 2009 Confederations Cup semi against Spain. Holy shit. US ran the #1 team in the world off the pitch (they had a 35-game unbeaten steak coming in).

To be fair, when Curry is hot I lose my shit as well.

A friend recommended last night I do a Twitter search for “Steph Curry Cam Newton.” I don’t think I’ve regretted anything more.

Damnit.

For every Charger fan that bails, 3 more are made in Los Angeles.

I don’t fight people who bring tridents.

I mean, I bailed, minus the Superbowl. I don’t miss the games at all. I was also a Charger fan, so, you know, QED.

Good to see they finally got rid of stupid punting!

Monroe plans to use his time off to educate children on the dangers of pain killers in football by starting the first ever Puff, Puff, Pass and Kick competition.

As I said in the Bale post: Sterling was wasteful and hurt the way the rest of the team was trying to play. Constantly cutting inside and choking Rooney, Lallana etc, while offering nothing to boot.

Kyle Walker has been England’s best player. Not necessarily a good thing, but he has looked very lively and at times the…

An American wondering why the little people can’t have nice things is a little too on-the-nose even for kinja, don’t you think?

Also: Raheem Sterling is trash and should be stapled to the bench. I don’t understand why people rate him.