Your mom sounds like a smart lady. That's good advice.

Two things: 1.) Soledad O'Brien is killing it lately. 2.) How did Reince Preibus get to be RNC chairman? Who voted for him? All I see (and hear) is someone I desperately want to punch, and for reasons having nothing to do with what's coming out of his mouth. How did someone look at him and say, "Yup, that's the…

Holy shit.

Don't be silly. Women don't have feelings. They're not people, not like the menz. (This applies to race and other minorities, too)

I wear 4-inch heels almost every day #sorryfeminists

Mittens kind of implying that government jobs aren't real jobs caught my attention, too. That's funny, I thought to myself. Because I'm fairly certain that one of them is paying my mortgage. If it's not a real job, WHAT IS MY HUSBAND DOING ALL DAY?!?!

Dear Jeanne Monahan,

I'm trying to figure out what questions you ask someone about their boobs. "Do you like your boobs?" "At what age did you get boobs?" "When did you realize you had big boobs?" "Do men stare at your big boobs?" Nope, none of those questions are interesting. "Do you see Joan Harris as a feminist character? …

She's definitely on my list of ladies I would give up the peen for. Interestingly, all of the women on the list have the same large breasted, hour glass shaped figure. I don't know what that says about me.

I enjoy The Vampire Diaries because no other show rips through plot quite like it does, and I like True Blood for it's constant what-the-fuckitude. However, I remember being strangely relieved when I read The Passage, and remembered, "Oh, yeah. Vampires are supposed to be scary!"

That sounds delightful. Actually, the best wedding I've ever been to was held in the bride's aunt's back yard at 2:30 pm on a Saturday afternoon. The groom's brother brought his massive smoker and we had BBQ pork and a whole mess of sides. The bride made her dress, the groom's mom made the cake, and the groom's dad…

At what point do we determine that someone can't handle living in society and institutionalize them permanently. Because Mr. Long seems like a candidate for this sort of thing.

I remember the moment when I became aware that there was something "wrong" with my body: I was in eighth grade, I went to school in a new pair of pants, a friend said, "You look great! You look like you lost ten pounds!" and I thought, Do I need to lose ten pounds? And I've spent the rest of my life wishing I could…

Oh, sweetie. That's really sweet that you're excited to be married. But nobody denies that your wedding night will be exciting if you don't have sex before you get married. What we worry about is after the first year when your wife realizes that you only want about half the sex you do and starts wishing she had…

Reason #12747075325784 why I want to take Falconbaby and run away to an island far from civilization with her.

Whoever makes it out of the royal vag first.

I thought the same thing. In retrospect, I'm not sure why I thought humans ought to be special, but I guess I did. Learn something new every day.

I love the open mouth kisses so much. Falconbaby grabbed me by those really sensitive hairs at the base of my skull and pulled me in for the biggest, wettest, most open mouthed kiss ever. I literally said, "Ow ow ow ow, awwww, that's sweet, thank you, cupcake!"

I feel like I should print this out and tape it over Falconbaby's changing table so that in a few months when she is a toddler, I can refer to it. I feel like this will come in handy.

That's kind of the point, as I see it. I've mostly been part of that 47%, but it wasn't because I didn't take "personal care and responsibility" for my life. It was because I didn't have a very good job and I paid a lot in student loan interest. I paid what Turbo Tax told me to. But when I do that, Mitt Romney…