God is a cruel motherfucker. For proof, see Genesis through Revelation. Anybody who doesn't see that hasn't been paying attention.

I found the Outlander series to be pretty readable (at least the first two books — I didn't love the third and I haven't read after that). It definitely revved my engine a little.

Oh my god, I first read that as Dr. Drew and I thought Wha-huh? Then I looked a little more closely. Oddly, though, I wasn't terribly surprised by the idea of Dr. Drew beating a reporter up, just surprised I hadn't heard about it.

I really love the idea that a woman can work as a prostitute for a while, then get out, get married, have a business, have a baby, and wind up leading a really lovely life. I have no idea if that's what's going to happen to Ashley Dupre—she and her fiance may be fucking awful for all I know—but I'm going to believe…

Using copyrighted material to illustrate a news story is a pretty well established practice.

I'll bet it's not just that they don't want to wade through the bullshit, it's that they get kept down. The same as how you see the careers of really effective managers often get stalled early on because someone up the totem pole doesn't want to have to compete with them for a job someday, so they promote the dingbat…

Oh, you with your Biblical references. Unless it is something from the Old Testament about how it's totes cool to kill gay people and sluts, Rickles doesn't want to hear it.

And therein lies the entertainment value. Can a person be dumber than a stump? This fall, watch as 20 women try, only on ABC.

Oh my god, The Batchelor, get on this! I would watch the shit out of that. All the girls trying to be dumber than him would be AWESOME.

I'm not sure that's totally true. In A Primate's Memoir, Robert Sapolsky talks about how in-demand female baboons, when uninterested in an alpha male who clearly has designs on her, will lead him past another dominant male to initiate a conflict between the two males. Then she'll high tail it off into the bushes…

Okay, that is actually funny. It pokes fun, but doesn't do anything nasty to the person or his reputation. Excellent. I want to be friends with those people.

Okay, seriously? You're going to make me say it? LEAVE JESSICA ALONE! Seriously, the woman had a fucking baby. It took her nine months to get that way, it's only fair to give her nine months to get back. Or, y'know, you could just accept that her body is none of your fucking business and move on with your life. …

I always feel like, "Okay, let's stipulate that you can eat garbage and not get fat and always have glowing skin. Why isn't your body absorbing calories the way healthy people's bodies do?"

What? Ew. No.

Either that or it will be exactly the kind of mass infusion of cash the world economy needs. Hold the thing in Greece and we might fix this whole Euro thing.

Not to mention that it's just fucking stupid. I had a miscarriage at 8 weeks. You know what came out of me? Goo. And not even a lot! Like a heavy period. And the vast, vast majority of that was uterine lining, not fetus. Anyone who looks at a puddle of red goo and thinks, "Yup, that's the same as a baby," ought…

Thank you for the image of Paul Ryan bounding around suburban soccer fields like a gazelle.

Oh, Comtesse, I wish I could heart you twice.

I'm at work, so I can't watch this, but I think the cover shot on this video pretty much says it all.

Wait, what was his point? Your kids were obviously good at sports so you ought to have more? You should be contributing more foot soldiers for the Motherland—I mean, America?