Go back and keep reading it. There's more that needs to sink in.

"Our filtering system failed"

I dunno, this seems like it accurately reflects the beliefs in many parts of Boston.

I mean, to be fair, most of the original Patriots did too.

Shouldn't the Eagles' PR staff have some sort of policy against their players following other teams?

be careful with that coffee! i hear it dehydrates you.

shoe size has little if any correlation with penis size

This needs to be a poster. A really BIG poster. Posted in every schoolroom in the United States.

Thank you!

So as the top dog on the Shade court, does that make you Ruth Shader Ginsburg?

Also, any guy who enjoys blowjobs and uses "dick-sucking" as an insult is a fucking hypocrite.

MyNope. Infants can't let you know when they are abused. Handing a two week off to a non-regulated stranger is less than ideal. Daycare centers do not take infants less than two weeks old.

I don't think it's totally unreasonable to be nervous about handing your weeks-old baby to a babysitter you had to find within a week, though.

Tape

Just look at that bread. Think about a sandwich made with that rather than store brand white bread (or even name-brand white bread). A loaf of the bakery section bread is going to cost you all of $1-2 more than the stuff in the printed plastic bags.

This is true, and the same goes double for tweezers!

Paper Towels

It doesn't really matter what brand of toilet paper you upgrade to because pretty much everything is better than the cheap stuff. Unless you're a fan of wiping up with thin sheets of printer paper, splurge a little on a decent roll of toilet paper and you'll live a happier life.

I am a technical writer. I insist on it. The oxford comma can never be read incorrectly and only serves to clarify a sentence. I say this while denouncing some of the other rigorous rules of language and grammar. I, for one, think that we should eventually start merging the spelling of certain homonyms.

Can we take a second to talk about the Oxford comma? Who's for it, who's against it, who doesn't care either way? Discuss. (For the record, I am 100% PRO OC.)