My uni’s Afro-Caribbean society seemed to be more of a social club than anything else. Hopefully NTU’s is a bit more organised and will hold the administration’s feet to the fire.

Age of criminal responsibility is 10 in the UK.

I was really confused at first, because it didn’t happen on a Wednesday, which is sports night, which is when “lads” will have been drinking from 1pm. For reasons of taste, decency and self-preservation, I learned very quickly to never be in any uni or student-friendly bars on a Wednesday night.

The only thing I eat out of the fridge when I visit my dad is yoghurt. Anything else is liable to be from his “mad chilli scientist” greenhouse.

I have an Indian not-boyfriend who orders extra chilli with everything when we go out to eat. The only spice he respects is my dad’s homemade Carolina Reaper/ghost chilli paste. I told him to use it sparingly, but he spread it like butter on a chapati...

Nollywood is such a force that a British woman is making a good living being the “token white girl” in their films.

We have our movies and stories. They just don’t go worldwide.

The thing is: Africa is tribal. That is one of the factors that has held development back (and also why I thought we had two presidents a little while ago). And most cities are a clash of contrasts, due to increasing urbanisation.

Can report that it is a smashing success across Kenya. My 94 year-old grandmother who doesn’t speak English has been to see it. The only Kenyan I know who hasn’t been to see it yet is usually based in California, but is currently visiting family at home way out in the countryside where there are no cinemas to be found.

Leave Britney Brum alone! I went there for university and didn’t leave for over a decade after graduating. The racists like it for their rallies because it’s a nice central meeting point if you’ve been chugging lager on the train all the way from the provinces. I’ve been in those so-called “no-go areas” way past the…

Did you see that he’s been at CPAC this week? Introduced with an excerpt from Powell’s “Rivers of Blood” speech?

How could I forget?! Most remiss of me.

That was one of my favourite Auntie Beeb bloopers. But I mostly listen to Radio 4, so I have a special place in my heart for when Humphrys called the health secretary by his proper name.

Some fuckwit did the same thing my bus home after I’d had a long, shitty day. Rather than telling him outright to stop (kids round here are not averse to stabbing people), I instead asked him to stop for a few minutes, before launching into a meandering musing on the origins of hip-hop, which lasted until he…

My neighbourhood has a KFC, a chicken shop that doubles up as an internet café, and another one that recently had a mysterious kitchen fire.

Lunatic Express (Nairobi-Mombasa) is an overnight trip to cover under 500km. It is a brilliant train ride, though. Nairobi-Kisumu is much the same, though in a different direction, and not as scenic.

Meh. It’s not high-speed, it’s a single guage railway from the coast to (eventually) Lake Victoria and beyond. I’m ambivalent about it because it might spell the end of my beloved Lunatic Express.

I’d like to say that I’m shocked and appalled.

I’m glad you said something, because if not, I’d have had to jump in. And I’m in the greys, so most likely nobody would have seen it.

Slight (and late) correction: there have always been whispers about Harry being the product of Diana’s affair with James Hewitt (former cavalry officer, never her bodyguard). Overlooks the fact that there are plenty of redheads on Diana’s side of the family.