Never feel bad about not realizing sooner. As you say, it's fully possible he didn't realize earlier either. Even if he did, shame on him, not you. Much to my ex's confusion, I was completely blindsided by him dumping me; while it made/makes me feel cheated somehow (because let's face it, there came a point when he…

I'm sorry to hear about your struggles! I can't pretend to relate except on a very general level: my ex, after years of "I'll move anywhere to live with you, no problem" realized, when push came to shove, that he didn't want to leave his hometown. It was only a tiny part of our issues, though, and I need to keep…

Hang in there! I don't know what your situation is and what your sources of stress are, and that makes it hard to give advice. Like others, I think exercise or just going out for a walk, watching shows like the Simpsons, looking at baby animals, and having coffee with friends are all super-awesome ways to reduce…

Holy mo! I'm so sorry. That's just the worst. To give him the benefit of the doubt, he might still be a mess himself and trying to prove something to himself or to you. Or then he just doesn't give a rat's butt. Either way, he is definitely a grade-A jerkwad. I'll be seeing my (as-of-fairly-recently) ex in a week, and…

I'm finishing up my second year in a PhD programme in the US, having moved here from Europe. I was foolishly nonchalant about the move because I've moved around enough that my support network consists of friends and family on Facebook and Skype anyways. I was also dating long-distance until recently. It worked well in…

I'm so sorry. Break-ups are so horrible. It's been almost two months for me, and I'm still struggling on a daily basis. I am feeling a tiny bit better than I did at first, but it seems like these things take a lot more time than we'd like. And it's so tiring. I don't know about you, but I'm so exhausted and fed up…

As you and a commenter said, think about what's best for yourself. My situation wasn't the same, but had some affinities: My ex developed severe anxiety issues, I bent over backwards trying to help. He did try seeking help, but because of past bad experiences with therapists refused to do anything beyond getting a…

First of all, I'm so sorry to hear that. I can and cannot relate: my ex and I were never engaged enough to actually plan a wedding (as a matter of fact, we kept our engagement private), but as of six weeks ago, I have at least a vague idea of what you're going through.

I'm so sorry to hear that. For what it's worth, a pretty much identical thing happened to me a month and some ago. It's been a pretty miserable month, fluctuating between crying over him and crying over not being able to study and worrying I'll fail my huge pre-candidacy exams.

I'm sorry to hear you're having such a tough time. I moved continents for grad school so I kind of know the feeling. I know it's not really comforting advice, but try to give things time and try to keep putting yourself out there even if people aren't warming up to you as quickly as you'd like. With my hobbies, it's…

Thank you for posting that. I'm so happy things are going so well for you, and as someone in a sad, unhappy place, it was reassuring to read about it. I know my life will return to its normal awesome-ness and I just have to wait the sorrow out, and reading your post made me so excited for when that time comes.

I really think it completely depends on the situation and the motives. If the older person is actively only pursuing people much younger in an attempt to feel younger themselves, cling to an immature lifestyle, avoid commitment, prove to themselves they are attractive because they can still hook up with a 20-year-old,…

I know exactly what you mean about unanswered questions. In my case, my ex dumped me over a 3-minute call and has refused to be in touch since. Ugh! But as a friend said, what difference would any answers make? They would possibly make me more upset, and I would certainly just come up with more questions, or refuse to…

I am so, so sorry to hear that, and yet strangely comforted on some level because the exact same thing happened to me three weeks ago. The difference is, I didn't think/realize he was distancing himself from me even though we had been fighting a lot for a couple of months. I actually, strangely enough, was feeling…