Damn it. Now I want mozzarella sticks.

To replace another Congressman who got busted for cocaine possession. Florida! Merica!

I'll treat him to a glass of... yeah, "glass of vagina" doesn't really work. I need to work on my innuendo.

I think Christian Grey is better with even more hair.

...No one gives a shit about your boner, butters. I thought you knew that.

TAKEN TOO SOON

As a Texan, I just have to say NO to the whole thing. If you are cooking burgers over a flame, it is not a BBQ, it is a cook-out. If is only a BBQ if you are cooking meat with a smoker.

I remember when I was a teenager typing the exact same things. Silly me:]

For $400 I don't want to see the cord.

"all of us, together, championing the goods, makers and legends that instill meaning inside the moments of our lives."

I know this is a very serious issue, but every time I see ISIS, all I can think of is this:

Yes, welcome to Homo-Land!

Don't worry, D'Brick's got this one.

Be Ben Stein's Honey!

When is it wrong to hug people?

It's kind of suspicious that Rebecca hasn't been commenting on this thread. I would watch a sitcom or reality show where the down-on-his-luck celebrity Romeo, due to a lack of babysitting gigs, has to move back in with his hilarious and universally-beloved feminist sister Rebecca. Especially if it was called Every…

Be but sworn my love, and I'll no longer be a Capulet!

Listen to Kacey Musgraves

She obviously was looking to file this lawsuit when she applied for the job. This is someone (more likely an organization funding her) looking for a lawsuit to push their agenda.

Those are actually still images, that's just how awesome the Mudsummer is.