“Commander of the BLM domestic terror army”

Why, do they have many doors that need stopping?

Was she then asked to take notes and type them up afterwards?

I knew it! They’re coming for me through him, as soon as I commit the crime of transporting a minor across state lines for sex. And then, bring it!

Every time Vergara looks at or even thinks of her husband Joe, or watches him dance, or strip just for her...

I though her official nickname was “feckless cunt.”

TINA - The Tina Turner Musical has to be one of the least creative Broadway titles ever. They had a bunch of well-known song titles they could have chosen but didn’t. (All of these are in the show, so they were paying the rights to use them anyway.)

Really? This is the worst royal crisis in 85 years? Not Prince Andrew diddling teen girls on Pedophile Island?

If these are his Sunday-go-to-church clothes, I hate to see the rest of the week.

You don’t get rich and stay rich by using your own money when you can use someone else’s.

I bet Aaron Rodgers didn’t think he’d be engaged to someone who pretends to be other people for a living. But here we are.

Tell that to Edward (Teddy) Kennedy. But he was an old Irish twat, I guess.

My high school had a Kick-an-Italian-in-the-Head Day every year. And now you’re telling me it’s wrong?!?!

They won’t be doing any of this. The Republicans don’t control any of the committee agendas anymore.

I went for a walk yesterday. I’m “training for the Boston Marathon.”

Sure, they’ll also have to do an experimental fat transplant, moving about 100 pounds from Patient T to Patient B.

Oh my god, Greta Thunberg is vicious, stabbing him in the heart with a sharpened icicle.

To contrast, Melancholia started her life as a Florida retiree by stepping off the plane in this fugly schmatte.

Brace yourself for tears, then read the whole thing. It’s sublime.

This was an economic summit meeting and the white-haired woman is Christine Lagarde, at the time head of the International Monetary Fund.