Your mother and your coworkers aren’t nearly as nice, smart, considerate and kind as you think they are.

I used to love to read books about summer camp. The adventure, the excitement, the romance! Alas, summer camp was definitely a thing for rich kids. I was just lucky enough to live close to a public library so my addiction to terrible YA summer camp novels could be indulged for free.

I mean, the 14th Amendment says “natural born”, so since they’re unborn it’s pretty clear that they aren’t American citizens. Come on Huckabee, I thought you venerated the Constitution!

All American citizens should be protected

But he argued that scientific advancements have now verified that unborn babies are human beings — information he said wasn’t necessarily available when the Supreme Court issued its 1973 Roe v. Wade decision.

I don’t understand the trend of putting words on everything. Words on pillows, hanging words all over your house, words on jewelry, words words words. Someone I know has “EAT” on the wall in their kitchen. Yes, it’s a kitchen. That’s what goes on in there. In the living room is “Family, Dream, New York” (we live in…

Bear in mind the pain of that burn the next time you think you can prevent the flu with yak testicles or whatever you idiots believe nowadays.

It’s actually not as hard as you would think. I clinic escort usually one or two Saturdays a month (I’ve actually been inactive for a couple, and need to get back to it) but you end up focusing on the woman [and, in the South, often girl] that you are escorting. Answering questions, telling them they are okay and…

I would never make a good clinic escort (there's no PP/women's clinic in my town) because I would not be able to restrain myself from smacking this woman in the picture, for several reasons, and then I would go to jail.

That’s a good idea until the moment it enables Republicans to continue to disenfranchise you. Plan is dependent upon the right to vote, and one party is actively to trying to strip black people of it.

It blows my mind the shit people spend money on that’s stupid and not fun. My dad’s wife (not rich... she just thinks she is) has done shit like this for the entire 30 years she has been married to my dad. Whatever article she reads about some ridiculous shit people do she runs out and does it. In fact I hope to god…

My son (3) will try vegetables every time. He’s actually really good at trying everything. Eating it? Not so much. There are a few he’ll consume, but not many, and not reliably. He’s better with fruit. Apples, bananas, apparently now blueberries. Claims to like strawberries, but he’ll put it in his mouth and just hold…

This is the glaring point of hypocrisy in all of this for me. So few people are trying to channel the outrage towards banning import of hunting trophies and placing lions on the endangered species list, which would effectively make it illegal for U.S. residents to hunt them.

Sorrynotsorry, but I hope he gets the most painful cancer of the wiener.

He just happened to shoot the wrong lion. People are “outraged” because this one had a name. If he would have shot one of the no name lions, like what’s been happening, Jimmy Kimmel wouldn’t have been on TV crying. Next time he can do like all the other rich white people and shoot black/brown people. No one cares…

“oh, i didn’t realize it was like, a CELEBRITY lion, i thought i was just, legally, murdering a NORMAL lion.

Nah, fruits are fine, even if that’s all you can get. Try the sweeter veggies (carrots? sweet potatoes?) when you can, otherwise, really, don’t sweat it.

I was pumping at a rest stop the other day, and saw a couple roll up and change their kid on the outdoor picnic tables. I gave them a fucking filthy look (for being fucking filthy - there was a changing table in the bathroom). I could see the ‘you don’t understaaaand’ parental indignation face start. Then they saw the…