[gets erect]

Shame, too. Those sick kids could have used the new MRI machine. Oh well.

I have a recurring nightmare where I'm playing basketball and every time I try to take a shot I can't muster the strength to get the ball to the hoop and everything is an air ball. But even those shots look better than this

This is why I still watch football.

+1

Points for trying? SEE DAD RUGBY DOES IT

Friends said things first took a turn for the worse when he voluntarily committed with, and then moved to, Southern Utah

Playing Banjo: Vermont Catamounts

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Long ago I worked on "The Jamie Kennedy Experiment", and when we were in Chicago we did a prank at Ditka's steakhouse. Same story, he was supposed to help out but he got shitfaced and didn't do everything we needed from him. He got loud and happy and then kind of belligerent.

Now to get to the bottom of these "dog ghosts".

Dude, if you want free government publications so badly you don't have to go there on foot, all you have to do is write.

Invisible small pox blanket

I'm not sure why she was surprised. Anyone who has ever been to a gymnastics meet knows there are WASPS everywhere

Are there any readers that are competent x-ray technicians and have access to Martina Navratilova's dental records? Email us: tips@deadspin.com

On the bright side, his record of 18 gold schlägers should stand for some time

The truthers post was yesterday, please adjust your tin foil hat.

Who would have thought that pork could be Jewish?

Ushers were also called in to break up a particularly brutal thumb war

If you're interested in the math, at $20 a dance that's $4080!