This is one potential fix, Tom, but I still like the the NCAA's preferred practice (pictured) of putting band-aids on its broken system.

Stick to fellating dead Puerto Ricans, Gallego!

You're probably right. That would explain these* hives**.

Stick with the food stuff Gallego!

I am so throbbing hard right now!

Are you crazy man? You forgot:

+1 thanksgiving in shorts and a Wade Boggs jersey

Poor Ben Jr. lost his dad when Big Ben's head exploded after seeing the question mark next to Sex on the birth certificate.

Yes!

Yes!

If Malkin is serious about finding true love, he should check out OK!'s sister publication, S.O.-S.O.

"We know what you mean!"

On the plus side, Brandon's 7 disastrous nees get him a free bottle of Elizabeth Taylor White Diamonds.

As an overly horny narcoleptic with a small penis, why does it seem like the turkey's pop-up thermometer and high doses of tryptophan are constantly mocking me?

Sam, besides this question and having a name that would give Lou Holtz fits, what are you thankful for?

He's actually a great guy, but I think Ivan is taking this "turn the other cheek" thing a bit too far.

Mitch Albom stew sounds like it would be delicious, but who has a crock pot these days?

Yes!

86

+1