Wisconsin is also a state where anyone can get a drink at a bar, at any age, as long as they’re with a parent. Trashy state.

This really sounds like an episode of Nathan for You.

It was unfortunately used in that Dawn of the Dead remake, but People Who Died is a jam

He was perfection in Cabin in the Woods. Tequila is my lady!

When I was a kid, we once went to Disney World for Christmas. All the parks were playing an Alvin and the Chipmunks Christmas album on loop, all day. It’s a miracle the people working there didn’t commit mass collective suicide.

Yeah, they have. I’m not lying about anything. Suck my dick from the back.

Ain’t gonna play Sun City

Stuffing, mashed potatoes, roasted sprouts.

Last weekend I got into a half hour argument with a coworker who claimed that KFC is better than Popeye’s. KFC has adequate chicken, with garbage mashed potatoes and trash biscuits. Bojangles is a solid option too, though.

Nooooooo not Terriers! A great great, horrifically underrated show.

I hate this. IT’S YOUR FUCKING JOB. If I teach a class, I don’t expect personal thank-yous from every student, because teaching is part of MY FUCKING JOB. And the right thinks that liberals are the fragile snowflakes.

I think (fingers crossed!) you’re good with Mr. Rogers. My dad used to be his paper boy, and according to him, Rogers was exactly like he was on the show in real life.

King Krule is my replacement for the sadly defunct WU LYF. They don’t sound that similar, but it’s another mysterious band composed of a bunch of British teenagers and a singer with a ridiculous voice. I saw them a few years ago and was having similar rock star thought about their singer/keyboard player.

They’re huge in New England. My hometown of 30,000 in Maine has 8 Dunkin Donuts outlets.

Growing up in a rural area, most of my friends were gun owners. All of them thought background checks should be more thorough, we should ban bump stocks, close the gun show loophole, etc. The NRA has fucked the national conversation about guns into oblivion.

My grandfather had a couple of strokes and ended up in assisted living. We didn’t live in the same state, so I was only able to visit a couple of times. Both times, in his few lucid moments, he really only asked after two things: 1) bring me a Heineken 2) get me the fuck out of here.

I would like to also have the option to choose how I go out. Basically 80 year old me just wants to blow his retirement savings on booze and cocaine.

Sean Penn is the Bono of acting. I’m sure he’s done some good but... come on. This guy can eat shit.

Goddamn. When I was a grad student TA, I could barely afford rent and got a good deal of my calories from pocketing food from craft tables at seminars. Without those tax breaks I either wouldn’t have finished, or would be swimming in debt right now.