Just throw a mirror down in the basement. The Gator will spend so much time admiring itself that it will forget to eat and eventually just waste away.

Brett Favre is quite the inspiration. Every time I read a story about him, I wish even more strongly that I had played many years of professional football.

+1

Well, if anyone understands the plight of a once-legendary and widely beloved source of quality entertainment that slowly fragmented and alienated generation after generation of viewers until it became a shell of itself, appealing only to a small niche of fans, it's definitely Modern Family.

Brett actually did want the job. He was just flustered to be on the receiving end of an unsolicited proposition and was confused when the Rams did not understand that "no" means "yes."

When told the game tape was ambiguous, Belichick said: "Fine, if that's all you have to go on. But I've seen the practice tape, the sideline close-ups, and their halftime locker-room tape. Trust me, the Jets were doing this intentionally."

Huh. I would have thought that Gary Kubiak, of all coaches, would have had more tolerance for being constantly half-baked.

As one of the more frequent DS commenter Houston sports fans I know of, I feel compelled to say that I am spearheading an effort to buy the Titans, move them back to Houston, and merge them with the Texans to create a "super-team" that will absolutely dominate every other NFL franchise in its ability to temporarily…

As one of the more frequent DS commenter Houston sports fans I know of, I feel compelled to say that I am spearheading an effort to buy the Titans, move them back to Houston, and merge them with the Texans to create a "super-team" that will absolutely dominate every other NFL franchise in its ability to temporarily…

As one of the more frequent DS commenter Houston sports fans I know of, I feel compelled to say that I am spearheading an effort to buy the Titans, move them back to Houston, and merge them with the Texans to create a "super-team" that will absolutely dominate every other NFL franchise in its ability to temporarily…

Let's not move too quickly to burst entitled Laker fans' bubbles. And, you never know, Dwight still might reconsider and choose to play with the worst teammate professional basketball has ever known.

If you are looking for terrible columns that make everyone hate Cardinal fans, Kinja will happily provide two of them embedded in each Cardinals post.

Shoot. I just realized he is white. How do I edit a post?

I'm not surprised. No matter how much coaching they receive, those types just can't control their evolutionary instincts to run randomly with no sense of control.

You know I hate you, right?

7th Grader, 1982: Look daddy, I got a huge trophy for winning my Junior Golden Gloves tournament. This is the best day of my ...

Don't worry New England fans.

Pictured, front row from left:

Commence looking for meaning.

Hi. I wanted to let you know that your post was inadvertently posted in the wrong forum. There is a homophobic thread just over there —> which would appreciate your input as they seem to be short on brain-dead idiocy at the moment.