She sold her soul in exchange for Dotardo’s phony billions and a closet full of designer clothes and diamonds. She knows that if she dares to buck and/or protest he’ll flood the internet with pics and videos from her prostitution days and leave her penniless and ruined and possibly even have her killed. 

His suits are not designed to look good, they’re designed solely to disguise and hide his fat. Dotardo is obviously dangerously obese and every single clothing choice he makes is all about hiding it as best as possible. He even tucks his flappy jowls into his collar, which must be wildly uncomfortable, but he prefers…

Absolutely correct. Barron was the product of artificial insemination. Trump has never had sex with Melania so in his mind he “forgets” it’s his kid. And, like you said, he can never, ever be wrong or make a mistake, so he immediately auto-corrects himself.

So she made comments similar to the ones Dubya made after 9/11, eh? Imagine the gall. Americans are a bunch of tender-bottomed pussies who love nothing more than feeling sorry for themselves. And the “patriotism” idiocy is the biggest crock of horseshit of all, the assholes braying loudest about it are the ones who…

“C’mon people, come to our world famous shopping district and stay for dinner and a Broadway show! Don’t mind the dust, it’s totally harmless!”...Rudy, September 2001

Americans have no capacity to ever get the fuck over anything. Other nations have had entire cities completely leveled, MULTIPLE cities, mind you, and they’ve managed to get over it. But Americans never do.

No one cares about Trump’s creepy son or his nauseating make-believe “wife”. It is a 100% certainty that “Barron” was the product of artificial insemination and that Waddles hasn’t spent more than a combined total of ten minutes alone with the kid since his birth. Both Melania and Barron are nothing more than…

The flabby orange goober doesn’t even really understand what “hurricanes” are. In his mind they’re just scams poor places use to bilk aid from the US and dispose of their “very bad” dark-skinned people. To him it’s a little rain and a little wind, no big deal and nothing that merits his genuine attention. When he sees…

Teevee is Waddlin’ Don’s entire world. It controls his thoughts, his emotions and steers his every action. Take away his teevee and the fat gassy freak would literally become paralyzed with confusion and indecision, he wouldn’t have any idea what to do, say or think next. He can’t read and he doesn’t take anyone…

“Reportedly”??? The Falwells have always been scumbags. The fat dead one was a massive pile of shit and his clown college has always been a huge scam. 

And THEN ownership allowed Johnson the opportunity to CHOOSE his own successor! He chose Dave Wannstedt, the living embodiment of “easy” Madden AI. Then JJ blamed an ancient broken Dan Marino, like it was Marino’s fault Johnson had Ray fucking Lucas backing him up. This is the same franchise that banished Don Shula…

Exactly. They’re “tanking” for what, the opportunity to draft one guy? One QB is not going to magically turn Miami around. The real “problem” (and it’s the same problem several other NFL franchises have) is the team is owned and operated by a hoodwinking scumbag who makes the same money whether he gives a fuck or not.…

It’s a fucking disgrace is what it is. I notice that noted scumbag Stephen Ross isn’t offering free admission or beer vouchers to the fans to somewhat make up for throwing a pile of garbage on the field in a pathetic effort to supposedly “tank” (other than the Houston Astros has this actually ever worked?). This is…

It’s pretty funny when people get all outraged or act shocked when Lard Belly breaks a law or ignores a rule. It’d actually be WAY more surprising if he didn’t. Blubber-Rump is the most amoral human being alive today, he does what he wants when he wants and he knows no one’s going to do a damn thing about it either.…

See, I think MORE big-time football programs should schedule Liberty, just so I can be amused when “Oklahoma 89 Liberty 0" scrolls by on the ticker. 

Hey, maybe their football team still sucks but at least the ladies of Liberty don’t have to worry about arousing the boys with a glimpse of an exposed ankle or anything. 

Many years ago the original, now-dead Jerry Falwell insisted that Liberty would soon become a football powerhouse with a long and storied tradition of football excellence. Now, several decades later, Liberty still blows. Thus we can conclude that there is indeed a god and he or she is still laughing at the Falwells…

Listen to him...”and me”...yeah Fatty, when the USA sends aid it’s generally assumed that the POTUS is in the loop. He’s such a tactless gasbag, there’s nothing he won’t grandstand on.

Once again the obese orange gasbag trolls America and once again America takes the bait. The cretinous gassy freak wasted the entire week on this goober fuel, studiously avoiding any real work by wasting everyone’s time with his furious gyrations and sub-imbecilic lies. No president has ever gotten away with doing…

The rumpy orange weirdo knows no one’s going to stop him, so why not “bend the rules” if it means a few extra bucks in his pocket? He does whatever the fuck he feels like without consequence, so what does he care?