All I want at work is a ticket system for tracking issues that IT has to deal with. I have been asking for 2 years at this point.

I bought spares of all the filters in my vac, and now I just swap them all out and wash and let them dry over the next month and do it all over again.

I dunno... Maybe just start making less soup so there is less left overs.

Yes. Testing your own network, to see if anyone can easily break in.

I 'cheat' and I put the eggs into plastic wrap when I poach them, since I can never get them to look anything like these here.

I want more car dealerships owned by guys who can actually work on the cars.

HA... Germaphobes make me giggle.

Neat!

Ron White: If I could offer one piece of advice to the planet, it would be this: Don't marry for looks alone, and I'll tell you why. In a few years, when Barbara's boobs start sagging, she can get plastic surgery, have them lifted, move the nipple wherever. You can actually go to a titty bar, pick out a set of titties…

Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and say that not being groped by TSA agents, waiting around in the actual airport for hours before you fly, running out of batteries on your portable electronics, being charged way too much for simple stuff, having to pour out water before you get through the checkpoints to only have to buy…

So lets say I wanted to import a diesel Smart ForTwo from Canada?

Yeah, you have to be in Government for that to be true!

I have a pad of Super Sticky Post-IT notes and a space pen in my car. Someone does something douchey, I leave a note. Yeah, it is passive aggressive... But you just know that makes them even more steamed.

That was a joke. I know how paper-obsessed certain businesses are. That was more of a reaction to someone in IT because every 'real IT person' I know absolutely despises paper. Oh but we love gadgets.

"Takes away the independance"? Are you serious? If anything, this lets them have a bit MORE since they don't have to err on the side of caution or trust people without any sort of verification at all.

"MEH! THIS R NOT SKINNAY!!!"

The wierdest thing is that afterwards, men from the audience run straight over to me and literally stand in line to talk to me. Bizarre, huh?

I didn't say it was a hack, I said it was easier. I have since found a way better method: The oven.

Trust me. You don't want any advice from a rich old white guy. Nothing that comes from his mouth is going to help your situation. Except maybe if you are not 100% filled with rage at men by now... Because he could certainly make that happen for you.