“IT, for constantly unlocking my computer”

She took the Jim Cramer clip, posted it to twitter, and just said “I’m Elizabeth Warren and I approve this message”.  It was genius, and I hope she does something similar with this one.

Following the update:  That nosy-ass, busybody parent who spread the pictures around needs to be banned from future meets, too.

My suggestion for his theme song:

Nomination incoming: the ghost of Robert E. Lee.

Because it just burns Don Jr. up that dad never compliments his ass to the guests at state dinners?

Exactly! 2 DSSMs, Legion of Merit, and two DFCs? 39 combat missions in Desert Storm? They must really be gearing up the old Swift Boat machine.

You’re exactly right about Austin.  Even though it’s pretty consistently recognized as one of the best places to live in the state, and it’s the goddamn capitol, GOP shills still trot out that canard with regularity.

I think the stupidity is a saving grace.  Imagine how much more damage could be done to our nation and its institutions if the dimwits in charge were actually cunning or subtle, instead of brash and loud.

“If a car is cleaner than regulation tells you to make it, that’s not a crime right?”

It’s just not economical.  Rats require twice the number of shoes as humans.

The new term is orthorexia: an obsession with “proper” or “healthful” eating.

In the words of Mr. Colbert:  “Go, Team that Lives Near Me!  Destroy that team from Nearby Town! My team is the best team and will always be the best team, until I move!”

They know that if they show up looking better than Dad, they’ll get disowned. Can’t upstage the Emperor.

“Your product makes light of the suffering our people endured at the hands of the government.” Pretty reasonable take, honestly.

“saffron-colored urine”

Because the constant, seething desire by the wealthy and influential to prove themselves superior and worthy of attention will never be sated?  Is that it?

*chef kiss*