Ok we need the full story right now. Gather around kids....

There’s a reason the gas masks are right next to the pitters...

I don’t know how futile are they really though? I read a book about Hiroshima and many people who survived attribute it to being behind some sort of structure, concrete walls being the one I remember. I guess I figure better to try than not, no?

It looks like a post-apocalyptic hellscape because that’s pretty much what it is.

It didn’t crash. You see, we model Sa-2-guideline missiles, too.

I feel the need ... the need for speed.

I expect it works in the same way as those drinking bird toys work:

He knows when you are sleeping,
He knows when you’re on the can,
He’ll hunt you down and blast your ass from here to Pakistan.
Oooooooh,
You’d better not breathe, you’d better not move,
You’re better off dead, I’m telling you, dude.
Santa Claus is gunning you down!

Alternate headlines : This Squid Could Help Weaponize Flesh Eating Bacteria.

They’d probably be pissed that the spent they’re whole lives digging up carrots with a horse drawn plow for 5 cents a day.

Your mistletoe is no match for my T.O.W. missile!

We’re going to need a review, Jason.

Do you know that USPS doesn’t use tax dollars...? They solely rely on stamps and other products.

Enhance

Subtlety isn’t your strong suit is it? “Irregardless” isn’t even the worst offender.

If I could make one change there, it’s like 2 roommates in the same house and the landlord came in and left one or both of their bedroom doors unlocked. Then, one of the roommates sent their personal assistant to grab something from the house. While in the house, the personal assistant entered the roommate’s bedroom,…

Yeah, it’s heavy sarcasm. Space cake was in reference to a Patton Oswalt bit.

that is exactly what she said sir.

Not to mention all the deaths they cause indirectly by being so tasty yet not so good for you.