Ed Miliband, leader of the Labour Party and Her Majesty's Loyal Opposition. Bit of local difficulty on the Labour front these days, and, wow, does it show.

Full marks for a worthy articulation. Nicely done.

Can only assume this is an elaborate and nuanced trolling, since the idea of comparing 'Redskin' with 'Viking' (or 'Raider' or 'Buccaneer') is fundamentally absurd. 'Viking', 'raider', and 'buccaneer' refer to people who engage in aggressive, physical, and vaguely martial activities, which makes them natural mascots…

ROLL DAMN TIDE!

That's a bingo!

The tight-end Hernandez has been declared an unperson. Thinking of him or speaking his name is thoughtcrime.

Witnesses describe a group of men chilling out, maxing, and relaxing in the area shortly before the incident, although police declined to comment on whether the men in question were the victims or perpetrators, or even if the reports were related to the case at all.

I am adding a line to any future staff searches to factor in 'mightiness', defining the term loosely so we don't automatically go with gym-rats.

I had forgotten how unutterably brilliant this answer is. The bit at the end where attempts to extoll the virtues of education to help America, then stops, considers, and corrects herself to saying that education should help South Africans, is priceless.

Could be suffering from a serious repetitive-motion injury.

Thank you all for comments to GonnaBeDeadSoon, but I'm afraid he's unable to read them at the moment, as he's extremely busy picketing the Jackie Robinson movie.

Prior to recent rules changes, I suspect that a lateral-heavy approach would result in a lot of horrifying collisions. You get those a bit in rugby, where an attacker will receive or dump the ball right as a defender annihilates him, but you're technically not allowed to just zero-in on an attacker in the line and…

"idiot Bieberites" is a tautology. Otherwise, strong work. Carry on.

When did John McCain become an NFL coach?

That's some nice work.

You left out a key step. Should read: "Whip out your saucier pan, remembering to say, 'Excuse me while I whip this out' in the manner of Cleavon Little."