I’m too old and cranky to be adorable! But I’m totally drinking rn so I AM fun!

As a black woman I have to get this off my chest. If I see one more black man say this shit was brought up because of Birth of a Nation I am going to scream! I have known about this for at least 3 or 4 years you didn’t want to know don’t start with the conspiracy theories.

Leslie Jones is the Tara and Johnny of Rio 2016. Love her!

She is a glorious human being.

I saw Katie ledecky levitate a goose behind goody parsons barn! I saw it!

Sadly I don’t have kids. But as bad as things can be sometimes, watching my niece and nephew grow up is do wonderful. Last Sunday I was visiting them and my nephew half asleep reached up and hugged me. All the troubles I had just faded away.

God. How shitty! I’m sorry you have to know that about those guys. It just feels very unfair to be burdened with such information. At least I just saw my friend’s husband on Tinder compared to that shit it’s tame. But she IS one of my closest friends and I feel like I have to tell her. Now or later.

I think you’re going to have to tell her eventually but... If you feel like telling her right now would put her in a bad place maybe you should tell him that you’ve seen his profile and you know he’s on there. It might shame/frighten him into treating her better?

Hopefully she kicked his ass to the curb, is too busy to respond because she is snuggled underneath, or on top of, a new man with biceps like Pita Taufatofua and the stamina of an Olympic decathlete.

I feel you. BUT what I also dislike MORE, as I get older and older, is the way my body reacts to drinks 3 and 4 the next day, as if I have chugged a bottle of rat poison.

Thank you. I had colon cancer, and although I was lucky enough not to have to do chemo or radiation (They caught it super-early, though a routine scope - GET YOUR BUTT CHECKED, YALL), I still had to have 90% of my colon removed, which was some pretty major surgery with a rather long recovery time.. and I always feel…

Can I add just a tiny thought?. Michelle seemed to be the accumulation of America’s black women last night. It all came around to her, in that moment; all the years and pain and struggle and success and reach. She just stood there.. in royal blue that still wasn’t royal enough... with those arms. That hair. And that…

I love that woman. I love her so much. She is elegant, smart, quick, hilarious, an amazing mother, a poised speaker. She has great kids and a certain Barack by her side in partnership through it all. She might be perfect.

Please thank this loyal citizen for planting the seed.

Excellent. Let’s run with that one!

How do we implement/define it though?

You get a healthy amount of dust popping eggs and there are plenty of other things out there to throw balls at. No Pidgeys! None!

Nope. No, no, no. I’m not throwing another gat damn ball at another gat damn rat! Burned 4 balls on one and it poofed. 4 BALLS ON A RAT?!?!!? No more rats, no more birds, no more spiky headed turds!