THIS BABY LOOKS LIKE IT KNOWS TOO MUCH.

What an insufferable cunt. And I really, really try never to use that word.

Oh lord, I have seen this article all over my facebook news feed this week and IT. IS. NAUSEATING. I was hoping Jez would make fun of it. :)

Only way that happens is if my check came in the mail and I decided to pour a glass of wine before the bra/pants come off.

I would legitimately hang that portrait of Sharon's dog on my wall. It would complement my Tretchikoff cups.

Plus the rumors that she's going to diss Taylor Swift during her performance are no good. I don't think she realizes that Taylor has some major America's sweetheart-points accumulated since her album and the giving fans gifts thing. It's not going to look good for her.

Or someone at comedy central asked to see his phone for a sec.

Dammit. I thought you meant that she was like loading up on Kalteen bars.

Ok, now I'm impressed. I can barely write a grocery list on my phone.

Wrote quick on my phone. correcting now.

His name was Javier and I met him when I worked at the bookstore in college. He was super hot, but that's because all he cared about in the world was his body. Good for him! Good for him. But between working out and moisturizing and hair care and trimming and and and, there was...not much left. But super hot and…

I kept reading polish week as Polish week, in which case I imagine the prep is less manicure and more:

17 and still paralyzed - therefore, still a minor and reliant upon his parents - and says it was a lie. You know what, kid? You're good in my books because that takes a lot of guts.

Yup, if any 30-year old man started talking to a girl when she was 15, and then slept with her at 17, and married her at 18, I'd call it grooming.

Like special dog, whilst moving.

Needs more o's

I actually never went to florida state. I'm a grad student at Barry University and I went to UCF for undergrad but thank you this is amazing!

TEAMPIE

You know what I find kind of interesting here? The only person we are SURE committed a crime... Who we know (and who confessed to) buried a body in a park, this is the person who got off without a single charge.