It was much easier back then, I'm sure, to just say "This is stupid. I'm going to focus on being a fast swimmer"

I'm the same and I kinda wish people would choose tiny waists instead of tiny thighs as the pointless, not-quite-changeable body part to obsess over - cos then at least I could find some clothes that just fit. hah

Sames. My thighs are the only part of me that isn't medium-sized-to-thin. People have glared and them and pronounced me "fat." That's how fixated people are on this arbitrarily-selected body part.

We had pebbles as our playground, um, ground, when I was a kid. Fell something like seven feet straight onto my little spine while doing some boneheaded maneuver on the monkey bars. Stopped spending all that time upside-down on things.

Fuck pretty. Where's my movie with Baba Yaga as the hero? Where's the Adventures of the Young Princess Mombi?

Hey, those football players are wearing as much pink as they can! They are doing their best to find the cure!

I was once dumped by a guy who was terrified that I was constantly, silently judging him. A main point of paranoia was his roommate's disgusting cat boxes. He was ashamed of them and wouldn't invite me over. Then he was upset that I didn't come over.

I don't tend to approve of huge extravagances but as a rule, one is NOT allowed to complain when one is provided with free and limitless whiskey.

I can't imagine actually noticing when one out of 200 guests doesn't bring a gift. Hell, I don't notice if my sister doesn't give me a birthday gift.

Last wedding I attended, the couple had a looong string of pre-parties over the months leading up to the wedding, but they weren't expensive or unpleasant events - it was just that a large percentage of the get-togethers the social scene had, this summer seemed to be in the couple's honor. I don't think it cost anyone…

OMG somebody knit this broad a slutty shroud. bahaha

My best friend had to remind us all NOT to wear costumes to her wedding. We are kind of used to costume parties, year-round.

BAHAHA you can't make up stuff like that.

But a lot of other guests were sniffing about how casual it was and how they couldn't believe they weren't following X tradition or Y custom.

Seems like people who travel a long way usually get an exception on anything that requires extra money/effort. The times I've travelled, the brides have been touched and impressed that I made the journey. (Brought gifts both times cos hey: in for a penny, in for a pound. Or more realistically, a grand.)

I have a good time once I'm there, but think of them as a huge chore while I'm anticipating them. Haven't known any bridezillas - just some classy ladies and a few perfectly nice attention-whores. I think I'm just full of dread when I think about them because it's a very public arena for a young woman's family to air…

JP? That is the best wedding theme I've ever heard of!

Sounds like you really dodged that bullet!

Maybe we should all just start biting the bullet and telling our friends: "listen, friendo: I can't afford to even attend your party, let alone bring a gift." Maybe that would stem the tide of gigantor weddings and make us all feel less afraid of sitting weddings out.

Pledge $300: bride will actually converse with you during reception.