"A large percentage of conservatives make me embarrassed to be a life-long member of the Republican party. We've turned from the party of conservationism and diplomacy, to a party of mouth breathers who scorn education, throw religion in everyone's faces, and generally act like douchebags." You said it brother.

Trolly McTrollerson.

I love your pieces and look forward to reading your book. You really have a great way with humanizing the life of a convict without making excuses for them or yourself. But you also have a great sense of explaining a culture as an anthropologist and giving context for its idiosyncrasies and social mores. Best of luck…

Santa has always tried to tell others how to behave. Judgmental dick.

Lindsey Lohan was so adorable when she was younger.

Man, the Johova's Witnesses are really getting serious about spreading the good news.

I think I'm in love with you. We should run away together.

Your hat is an indefensible position.

What an asshat. I want my $4. (Better off Dead reference with inflation).

Just saying, it's not a scientific response. Every person is different. Genetically speaking. And knee jerk or not, it happened. You could've easily died as well taking off a doctor prescribed defibrillator.

Jim Fixx died, while running, of a heart attack. Maybe you're wrong. And just lucky, genetically speaking.

As a KC resident, KC Masterpeice is an old school sauce. Not bad, just saying there is better. Most KC places would put an egg on as well.

Cosby agrees.

To be fair, she is 315 years old in dog years. The fan base that loves her the most letting them know its time for dinner.

So......bet the under?

I own a few watches with Sapphire Crystals. They are certainly more scratch resistant, but I, like you, never thought they would use them for phone screens but for the much rumored iWatch. I still refuse to believe that apple ever intended to use sapphire for the phone screen as the production methods are too involved…

I assume the player was from Russia and the umpire was from the Ukraine.

"No me duele!" Spanish for, "bitch ripped my ear off, I don't care, let me beat this whore.". Or, "I'm not hurt.", if you follow Rosetta Stone.

This is #2 so far this season. #1 is still, "Famine her right in the potato".

Love the handle, sir. Where are you located?