...skip the entire second act?! How does that even make it a good musical anymore? And all the best songs are there too! I'm super pissed that the schoolchildren of America are ignorant of the 2nd act. This is a travesty.

I fully understand the criticisms of Lana's music, and this song is awfully pretentious, but I would still slow dance to it while wearing a short, flower-patterned dress at a party in a loft in Brooklyn. It's kind of catchy, and the hipsters are going to go insane over it.

Could you please TW your Steinbeck jokes? I get flashbacks to 8th and 9th grade hell and its your fault for not warning me of the content of your piece and giving me an alternate reading to do.

I went to a rally at Philly's City Hall today after the decision came down. Everybody there was really psyched about it. And my parents are going to get married legally next winter! They got married in Massachusetts in 1987, obviously back when it was not legal, and so now they're waiting so their legal anniversary…

Praying for death? Everybody knows you're supposed to pray to Satan. You sell your soul and then he takes the test for you. My friends and I had a summoning ritual in the five minutes before our first final last semester and that is the only reason we all passed (we napped instead of studying). On a normal test, the…

THE TAGS THO. Thank you for forcing me to abandon all hope of doing anything productive tonight.

Is it just me or is something strange happening with NPH's face and hair?

I blame everything that sucked about middle school on the fact that I never got my Hogwarts letter.

Forget sweaters, how about when the belt loops on your jeans get caught?! You sort of fall down but can't get all the way to the floor because your goddamn belt loops are holding you hostage. This may or may not have happened to me several times this week.

I have stood in that bedroom, with several obsessive tour guides around, and now I have mad respect for your stealthy boning abilities.

Okay, I'm seeing from the comments that apparently America is really late to the party, but my friends and I discovered him last fall and we thought we were so hipster and ahead-of-it, and still nobody else in our school knows about him, so we're still super cool! Now Papaoutai makes me sob every time and Alors On…

Okay, fine, there are a lot of reasons promposals are the worst, but all the ones I've seen at my school have been genuinely sweet, and they generally happen among people who are already dating and assume they're going to prom together; this just makes it official. It's sort of stupid, but its cute. At my school, a…

I JUST HAD A BRILLIANT BRAINWAIVE: PRINCE GEORGE NEEDS TO GUEST STAR ON CALL THE MIDWIFE ASAP

Once at that zoo on a field trip, I saw 2 turtles totally humping each other. Most parents turned their kids' heads away but the kids got real upset over not being able to see the turtles. My friends and I, being in junior high at the time, laughed our heads off and also watched really closely. I will never forget the…

Actually, though, next year's Jezebel March Madness bracket should be feminine hygiene products.

Gifilte fish is honestly not all that bad, especially when you compare it to the horror that is the gefilte fish pie my grandmother makes. I would argue that it is creative to the point of torture. Never again!

Was there no school nurse in any of this? I'm seeing a lot of debate in the comments about the teacher's medical authority and decision making process and why a girl this sick was in school anyway. Personally, I think its nice that a teacher cares that much about her students (even if there are some problems with how…

Could you maybe do a post that has a rundown of all the terms ever used to describe trans people and the connotations attached? I'm sort of new to all this stuff, and I would like to be able to communicate more with and about the trans community without unduly offending people. And I think having a guide would help a…

Damn it, Lily Allen, I actually like your music but you keep saying and doing stupid shit and that makes me feel conflicted.

At my school, the 10th grade social studies curriculum is African American history. The summer before, we have to read Malcolm X's autobiography and write a whole essay comparing it to one of 5 other influential African American biographies. People come out of there knowing this stuff. I am currently pretty damn proud…