My thought exactly! Goop is for people who want that insanely curated lifestyle but are too lazy to curate it themselves. And the Marissa Hermers of the world are far too tasteful to appreciate something just because it’s obscenely overpriced. They are fine with cheap gifts as long as they’re darling, thoughtful,…

I feel confident that Marissa Hermer would be just a bit put off by a gift from Goop. Not because there’s anything wrong with Goop — good god, no! Marissa Hermer absolutely adores Gwyneth and truly admires her entrepreneurial spirit. It’s just that in the circles traversed by Marissa Hermer, Goop is so... expected.…

you sound like the neighbor everybody fucking hates

You fucking people can’t see the forest for the trees. The problem is NOT trump it’s the assholes who voted for him, THAT is what should scare you. This country has a huge problem and it’s a poorly educated and frighteningly ignorant population.

Fuck tomatoes. And potatoes. :(

I would have laughed and snarked at this a year ago but I’m on a very restricted diet and have to be gluten, dairy, soy and nightshade free. My medications wreak havoc on my gut. I’m the teary eyed bitch at restaurants drinking gin straight and smelling all the good shit I can’t eat anymore.

1 in 13 kids are born now with food allergies- often life threatening- so sorry if not everyone finds it hilarious.

An EpiPen. It’s high priced so they know you aren’t a cheap bastard while showing that you really care.

Yeah, after fighting Lyme disease for 2 years and ruining my intestines with antibiotics, I don’t need friends who are giggling at me or consider me a pain in the ass. Don’t invite people if you’re not happy to have them there. By the way it’s not always allergies, sometimes it’s FODMAP which is malabsorption and can…

So, a list of passive aggressive gifts you could give your friend to prove that you’re a selfish asshole who cares too much about how other people live their lives?

The culinary program at one of our local community colleges rents theirs out very reasonably when it’s not in use.

I knew a starving actress who did just that. She got better hourly rates late night, so she rented a 3 hour block at a commercial kitchen to make brownies and cookies to sell to local coffeehouses.

This is why I don’t eat at school events. I don’t know whose family made what, and for some reason, mayonnaise is a prime ingredient in everything festering on the table.

Or you could hit up google, grab a recipe and make your own. It’s not that hard.

I mean, we have food safety laws for a reason. Food safety laws are why the people who make your food have to wash their hands after they poo. Or, remember how entire families have dropped dead of botulism because of improperly canned tomato sauce?

They’re pretty much illegal everywhere.

Friend of mine buys cooked shrimp adds to some salsa & calls it ceviche. Bitch! that is not ceviche. I brought the real deal to a party once. made little signs “Ceviche” for mine and “Shrimp salsa salad” for hers. she was not amused.

I’m going to be annoying but there is a reason there are food safe laws. I’m not saying this woman’s ceviche is going to make you sick, but selling food that you make in your standard kitchen cannot be guaranteed safe.

Actually he said in a facebook post that he’s not only already voted for Clinton but he’s been doing ground work for her and spent hours canvassing, so that is attractive.