Sending out my wedding invites next week... totally gonna send one to the Obamas.

And then bring it up a year or so later so they know you knew.

In a more serious response. Sometimes, especially once they are teens, let ‘em get away with the lie. Kids, especially tweens and teens, treasure those little victories. Occasionally throw them a bone, and even though you got them bang to rights, let them off with it and pretend you didn’t catch them and that you…

Yeup. Friend of the owner/landlord also meant if I went in on a crazy busy night I’d glass collect and run the damn dishwasher in my going-out clothes and heels.

I interpret this as the mom saying that nudity isn’t a big deal. How silly it is that a toddler’s ambiguous body is allowed to be naked but once there are distinguishable breasts, it is taboo and shameful. I could be wrong but I really don’t think this woman is exploiting her child.

I work at a farmer’s market. We’re basically a small barn in the middle of an empty fill lot on the side of the highway. People are ALWAYS asking me if I “have any in the back.” That, or “Do you grow all this out back?”

you can tell when someone has never worked retail, because they don’t recognize “the back” as a place that retail employees go to hide for 5 minutes on the pretense of looking for something they know doesn’t exist

Maybe the snobby rich white regulars have just sucked the life out of the staff.

A couple of friends and I went to the Parthenon in Chicago’s Greek Town during a slow afternoon back in the late 90’s and the waiter willingly set a number of our non-saganaki dishes on fire with brandy for extra tips. We got chased out by the owner who complained we were scorching his ceiling.

With sex work you are consenting to sex within the condition that payment will be rendered for the sex act. Its sort of equivalent to consenting to sex with a condom, only to later discover that the penetrator took it off secretly. With conditional consent rescinding the conditions under which the consent was given…

You’re not praying for a cure, or to be healed of the cancer. You’re supposed to be praying for the wisdom and patience to deal with what you’ve been given. “The Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away.” When Jesus was on the cross praying “take this cup away from me,” it was pretty moot, as he should have been asking…

Last week on SNS I posted about my father’s impending death, and so many of you replied to me with your own stories of dealing with dying loved ones. It was more helpful than you can imagine. I just wanted to update and say that my dad died early on Sunday morning, about 10 hours after I posted my story here. It was…

Eh, the lobster in general shouldn’t be eaten so the butter doesn’t mean much by that point. It’s like saying “well, he was eating human flesh but even WORSE he was having GMO potatoes with it”.

Missed opportunity here. After the ambulance left, Dana should have asked the quartet, “Did you still want a pizza? Try praying for one. See how that works out for you.”

Mormons shouldn’t be drinking coke either since it also contains caffeine. If they do, they’re hypocrites.

If I walk into a bar and I see anybody with a firearm and a drink, I leave. Guys like this are the reason for that policy.

life can be such an asshole and i can only imagine how much it sucks when your freakin parents get a jump on teaching you this

I mean, Jews may pour a glass of wine in the hopes that Elijah the Prophet will show up, but that’s two glasses of wine per year (one for each Seder). It’s not as if we go to restaurants every week and waste a meal and beverage for a prophet who may or may not show up.

When I worked retail, I came out of the stock room to say an employee had passed out, and a customer upon hearing this asked me to ring them up.

Well if it makes you feel better, no one who lived there had the advantage of plumbing, so you probably weren’t the first to do it.