I know this is more of a sit-down restaurant kind thing, and I've tried reading through the comments, but I can't get the grays because my computer is messed up today, so if it's already been addressed, then i'm sorry, but : how about fast food? I worked in a fast food restaurant and I've had a few people bring their…

See that only works on the assumption it's being sent back because the food is bad. More often than not the food is NOT bad. THAT is why it pisses off people (especially the kitchen) so fucking much. We know when we've done wrong. We know when we've sent out a slightly over cooked burger - we're just sometimes to…

Honestly, if you can eat gluten, and you choose not to, you are a) stupid as shit and b) an insufferable asshole.

My general rule is more than a couple bites, you're on the hook for it. If you take 1-2, you can send it back, though. I had numerous customers do this, and I never minded doing it, even if the kitchen sometimes did. Generally, they were actually great customers — they felt bad about it and a lot of the time I had to…

My father is the GM of a chain restaurant that does guest surveys (the ones that print out every 10th check or so) and he had been very vocal as to how much of a sham he thinks they are. Naturally the upper management assumes that the higher the guest scores, the better business the store will do.

I roll my eyes at every tribal tatoo I see on someone that clearly has no connection to that culture, but lots of folks have beautiful tattoos that are either meaningful or simple artistic expression.

How about if you just got a tattoo because you think it's pretty, meaningful, cool-looking, etc. and not because you want to show off how unique you are? I will admit that I admire counterculture-type people who don't have tattoos, because those people are increasingly rare.

Had this happen to me more times than I care to count.

I like my G&Ts with a few lumps and bumps

This reminds me of a gimick-blog where a guy tried to live according to the old testament for a year (and of course got a book deal out of it). It says that anything a woman touches while she is on her period is unclean, and you're not allowed to touch unclean things, so when his wife was pissed at him she'd go around…

When I worked at an animal shelter, we had people bring a cat in. A guy came in, spotted the cat and about shit - it was his girlfriend's cat. She had gone to college and her dick parents, who had said they would care for the cat in her absence, had told her the cat had been eaten by a coyote - they said there was no…

Sounds like someone is fulfilling the requirements of their 12 step program.

There was a recent podcast (Snap Judgement, probably, or maybe it was the Moth) that had this story about two Asian kids who won their school spelling bee and went on to the next level. At some point one of the boys was given the word "oriental" with a judge sniggering that he should have no trouble with the word. …

Upscale hotel in Boston, weekend getaway. I booked a regular room but it was REALLY NICE. Like, a lot nicer than I thought from the pictures and what not. Whatevs. After a lovely dinner, me and my guy are going at it on the king bed I don't remember booking? (*shrug* I'll take it) and mid-moan, mid-thrust, my guy is…

I was giving my husband a BJ and suddenly he got the giggles. I look over and here are my 2 cats just staring at me. Yes, I fuck in front of my pets because if I keep the door closed, they'll just paw and head butt the door, which ruins sexy times even more. Apparently, not only were my pervy cats watching us, but…

Dr. Muffley...ob-gyn...

Here is the one and only key to not tanking your own interview(aside from showing up in a lobster suit or equivalent)

I laughed nervously, assuming he was joking. (He wasn't.) As I fumbled through my answers ("I don't remember" and "Um, 23?" respectively), I cursed the time I spent scripting answers the night before, rather than researching.

My German Shepherd drove away burglars at least twice and protected the house from the mailman EVERY SINGLE DAY for almost 14 years.