They would still be funny Tumi. 

Said the DA, this will make for a briefcase. 

Doing sit-ups during the presidential fitness test in middle school I accidentally farted and it was so loud that the entire class stopped what they were doing and stared at me.

In the only game I ever umped- I kept striking out the kid who threw tantrums cause I wanted to see him lose his shit over and over again. Balls were bouncing before the plate and thrown behind him. No matter -STEEEEEE-RIKE!!!!!!

I batted .000 not one but two seasons in little league

It’s the very same people who say ‘why didn’t he just comply’ that are the first to say the ‘cops feared for their lives.’

Amazing to see the Republican Party transform in Treblink of an eye.

“I got STAMINA.”

Tom Hanks was Jamie Foxx before Jamie Foxx.

Good for those kids, especially Millie Bobby Brown, who definitely deserves a higher salary than the rest considering her role is so important and gets much more screen time.

So let me get this straight:

Some of us still remember “Booty Call.”

How much does Jim Carrey hate Jamie Foxx. He had the career pivot Jim desperately wanted. And now people rarely think of Foxx as they did during the first part of his career.

Congrats to Don’s girlfriend on getting her braces off recently!

You know it’s gotten bad when you feel creepy wearing your own bathrobe alone in your own home!

For context, I am definitely the kind of idiot whose mouth constantly writes a check their ass can’t cash.

This is this strangest exchange I’ll I’ve heard in a while.

Great. Another thing ruined by assholes.