My uncle was a die hard Republican in a blood red state. He railed against the welfare state and bemoaned all those good-for-nuthin’ lazy people who lived off unemployment that came out his hard-earned wages. He thought Obamacare or, worse, universal health care, was a communist scam. He felt all welfare recipients…

I’m just sittin’ here, Biden my time, waitin’ for better nominations.

I hope the number of stars you get for this goes all the way into the triple digits.

My wife and I — who in no way resemble the image that is almost certain to momentarily run through your head — are huge Rush fans.

If anyone groans, just ask them, “Kenya do better than that?” I know I sure can’t.

My wife is very emphatic in agreeing with you in this sentiment. Very.

My wife suffered a bad concussion last year — headbutted by our 18-month old, believe it or not — and developed post-concussion syndrome afterward. It really fucked her up (and she still isn’t completely healed nearly 16 months later).

I’m a straight, white, Christian 46-year-old, upper middle class man. In 2008 (and 2012), I proudly voted for our first African-American president. This morning, I proudly voted for our first female president. I live in California, so some could say my vote is symbolic, but watching my wife tear up this morning…

There’s no one as dumb as Scottie Nell Hughes inshallah the world.

Carlotta Danger.

Once you go gold, you can’t return to the old.

“I will never ever take the African American community for granted. Never, ever. I mean, whenever my chauffeur takes a wrong turn and we end up in a black neighborhood, I keep a close eye on every one of them ‘Never let down my guard. Disaster.”

I was nine years old in 1980 when Empire came out. The big reveal about Darth Vader being Luke’s father completely blew my young mind.

So, now that Melania has forgiven Donald for his reprehensible behavior, we should all forget it as well? Did I get that right?

Guilty. And I like Oxford commas and putting the comma after the year in a date, too. What are you gonna do about?

These excuses are just crap. Terrible, shameless, disgusting crap.

[While shaking my head]: Tut, Tut, Tut.

They will wait to see how the debate goes. If he tanks again, the rats will flee the burning ship. If by some miracle he does well, that will dominate the news coverage and they’ll stay on the Titanic until it hits the next ice berg.

My wife gets all the credit for being a good mom. I’m just a dad who loves being a daddy and a husband.

Parenting is a continuous exercise in picking your battles.