Frankly, I’ve never sausage ridicule simply because someone ended up on their buns.

+2400 billable hours for you!

As a three-time dad, I agree with all of this.

Olaf’d my head off at this.

Pro Tip: Bring a pacifier, bottle or two lollipops. Younger children have no ability or understanding of how to equalize the pressure in their ears on takeoff and landing, and it can be very uncomfortable for them if it isn’t done. Every screaming child on a plane at the beginning or end of a flight is doing it for…

Agreed - it made me think fondly of when I’ve noticed little details that changed how I viewed a stranger or otherwise made my day better/more interesting.

A Fabulous Thunderbird story that probably proves the point:

I could written the exact same sentence right down to the Gooner. I’ve been so charmed by this story and this coach that I even made my wife - who doesn’t give a crap - listen to the story and watch the celebration videos from yesterday. Even she got a little misty-eyed. Good stuff.

You just have to kill the squirrel:

Maybe even since Michael Fay went to Singapore...

Here’s my guy guess: Those are not the pants Harry originally intended to wear; rather, he forgot them, spilled something on them, or they clashed with the rest of the outfits. Enter a handler, who ran out and just grabbed another pair from somewhere (the President’s dresser?) and pushed Harry out for the photo op.

In a word: dumb.

Manspreader in Chief.

A Joke Too Far.

Ewe should be ashamed of yourself.

I realized about a year ago that the mediocre massage I get is infinitely better than the sublime massage I don’t.

... [Long Island Iced] tea facility...

If history is any indication, Ken Star will initiate a full investigation into these allegations of improper sexual conduct before ultimately releasing a scathing report on a busted real estate deal.

I paid 6 grand a month for five years to avoid mine...

This makes him the Portugese Bieber.