And yet somehow *I* was the mediawhore/distraction.

That...actually makes it a pretty half-decent burn.

What’s wrong with these? Clean buzzcut, high and tight, no sideburns, no mistakes.

Should be no surprise that a Penguin is cold as ice.

Maybe the ice cream is meant to help with the burns.

Scooter Gennett: Yo Ryan, got some Axe?

When you shower, at some point you probably grab a bottle of shampoo or body wash.

Agreed with this. I've suffered from depression in the past, and an hour of exercise was the best anti depressant ever. Not being depressed made it a lot easier to stop overeating, which helped me lose weight fairly quickly.

Theon Greyjoy Night did not turn out to be the synergistic success the Royal’s marketing department had been predicting.

“Looks fine to me!” - Andy Reid

It’s been, what, seven years? And still, yet another new Brett Favre dick pic surfaces.

Nassau Coliseum is the Star Wars bar of sports venues

“Homophobia, vandalism, racism, all on a Sunday”

These goal celebrations are getting out of hand

I think this is the most embarrassing thing here.

Smarmy commenter mistakes what's clearly marked as an advertisement for something Deadspin had any involvement with. Ironic.

I don’t know what they’re going to do about all the players recently out of UNC. None of those guys show up on tests.

This sounds a lot like Pronger’s concussion issues. Terrible news. Hope he gets well and can lead a productive post-hockey life.

He dribbles once, picks up his dribble, and throws it down. The junior high kids you ref must hate you.