"God may be your judge, but don't forget that I'm in charge of sentencing, bitch."

Losing to a team named "#yoloswag" makes it infinitely more frustrating.

Wow, so many apologies in a row; it's like he's in the Cal-zone!

Pegula was the front-runner all along

He looks like someone peed on his rug.

Actually, Ovechkin has always seemed like a pacifist to me. Watching him play defense is all the proof that's needed.

if you've never waited a table in your life, then you don't know wtf you're talking about. if you can't afford to tip, or if you refuse to tip, then you don't go to a sit down restaurant... PERIOD!

They uploaded it to their FB page. Do you know how long that takes? I mean, we're talking all of one minute. And it takes only one person to do so.

Your Server Was Rob.

That loud sound you hear isn't the sound of applause for this move , it's the sound of the Ravens' collective hamstrings snapping from all that backpedaling.

You know the situation is seriously fucked up when it's getting me to like Adam Schefter

In trying to think of a word to describe the way in which Goodell has handled this case, "clusterfuck", was the best I could come up with, and I think that's being generous.

"Exculpatory? Listen, firstly of all, they are still married. And B, I just don't see how you can see her as culpatory."

All things considered, Fred Durst looks pretty good, but that new Limp Bizkit song fucking sucks.

Would it even be possible to count the number of times Dana White has openly lied about his organization or its fighters in order to make himself look good?

It means the comment will be bringing a date to the party/wedding/what have you.

Riley Cooper: [Wipes Off Blackface]

MY SISTER MAKES $3,600 A WEEK WORKING FROM HOME MY OTHER SISTER MAKES $138 A WEEK DANCING AT FOOTBALL GAMES MESSAGE ME FOR DETAILS ON HOW YOU CAN GET STARTED

Fisherman: Holy hell! That thing is huge!