This AB drama has already provided me with more entertainment than the entirety of the last 20 years of the Buffalo Bills.

Pretty sure Gruden is eventually going to go plaid.

I believe the logical conclusion is that AB retires to become a helmet designer, and uses Lavar Ball’s manufacturing connections to go to market.  

Tired of all these primadonnas complaining about not getting to play with what they want. Well boohoo snowflake, there are millions of people who would gladly take your place and play for nothing. What happened to being a MAN and playing football in nothing but a leather shell? That’s real FOOTBALL. You go out there…

Not saving us from Trump?  That’s Peak Mets.

Someone saw him playing tennis, called him the Michelin man and he misheard it. This has to have happened more than once, so by virtue of it being said to him multiple times he thought nobody was called a “Michigan” man more so therefore he’s the Michigan man of the year! 

Two stories on barfing vultures in one day?

If Trump wasn’t a traitorous white supremacist grounding our country into the pavement, there’d be an almost endearing Baron Munchausen quality to the man. One day a visitor at one of his hotels or casinos, who happens to own a used car dealership in a small town in Michigan, pays Trump some benign compliment, and…

“Western Pennsylvania cracker plant”

browns fan here: i actually was rooting for the browns to lose that game, just because the steelers missing the playoffs meant so much more to me than the browns finishing with a winning record.

That was a pithier reply than I'd have expected from him, but it's probably not the first time he finished quickly talking about feet.

“I for one would like it if people stopped thinking about my safety.”

Jackson:

I look forward to the day when the rulebook takes four pages to define a clap. 

If we have helmet control, then only the criminals will have helmets.

You make rules to stop players from using their helmets as a weapon, and then they skirt those rules by using the other player’s helmet as a weapon.

For the remainder of the preseason, Nagy will make Long barf on the exact same spot of the field until he gets it right.

Nagy was more pissed that when Long threw the helmet, it bounced off both uprights. 

He should do another made up team like the “Houston Texans” next.

Drew, this was hysterical. To go to all the trouble of writing a WYTS for a team that’s not real is simply genius.