Meanwhile, Julian Edelman, just back from a three-hour jog in the rain, has poured himself a bowl of gravel to enjoy in his empty kitchen.

Russell Wilson heard that he had the opportunity to dance onstage with Flo Rida, but he decided to pass.

All Day I Dream About Salvation

Fuck Wilson. The dude just up and swims off at the first sign of rough weather. Some friend.

The fact that balls are a synonym for testicles is also not the issue - but it's extremely important that we discuss it whenever possible.

His first three college games, ever. Against teams ranked #11, #1, and #2. In the divisional championship game, the Sugar Bowl, and the National Championship.

If this was a project or experiment, its clearly over. This was hard to watch. Peyton is done. This game was horribly tough to watch and he's been playing like this for the last couple of games of the season. Whooof man, that was a fast slide and a bad one.

One of the greatest parts of my job are the days when Tommy Craggs, in a flurry of excitement, runs over to me and says something like, "Hey Cooke, can you draw Derek Jeter getting his ass eaten out?" or, "Hey Cooke, can you draw a quick dong on the new Cubs mascot?"

Yeah I'm into it because it proves we probably don't need as many cops as we have.

It's almost hilarious that when the NYPD sat around brainstorming ways to prove how necessary they are to the daily functioning of the city they came up with, "Stop writing tickets for bullshit petty offenses and harassing people on the sidewalks, that'll show 'em! They'll come crawling back to lick our boots after a…

Truly. This is a good thing for many citizens. Stop and frisk is a terrible policy that maybe (but only maybe) slightly reduces petty crimes, but the effects of the increased "policing" only engender more mistrust of police, swell jails and prisons, and disproportionally and unfairly target low-income, minority…

I'm fine with the slowdown. Keep it up long enough and we can decrease revenues from ticketing poor people, trim the budget, and fire some cops. Start with any that have had excessive force complaints.

It must be such a relief to see something black on the floor in Chicago that isn't Derrick Rose.

Shitbarf Guy isn't a first ballot HOF'er. He's clearly a #2.

He'll Suh, right?

Bill Simmons argues (stay with me) that you should judge moves by how opposing fans react.

Seems like a great career move for Harbaugh until he asks a room full of college kids "Who got it better than us??!!" and they reply "serfs."

So, would it be fair to say that this article has helped Darren Rovell's brand?

I'm pretty sure the girl who figured you out was a keeper. Anyone who not only gets it, but plays along is worth getting to know.

The P is in the V, so I'm amused.