This is the most important article Jezebel has written all week.

20. You are, scientifically speaking, the least diverse band of all time. What do you have to say for yourselves?

This whole "Walter" thing is my new True Detective. Please stay on top of this, Lindy. Is Walter the Yellow King? Just putting that out there.

I stopped listening to that stupid song after the second one said "I got two other bros that are just like I"

"Jordan, how do you know which one is you and which one is Lance? Do you ever wake up and think, '...Am I Miles?'"

She gets a lot of shit but I think she's a genuine person (just a very wealthy one) who means well. This makes me sad. Hopefully they can do what's best for the kids.

Well, you know what I am going to say. SAD! I hate divorces! I hope they are both feeling good about this.

I don't care I'm just gonna say it.
I'm pretty sad about this. Love GOOP and like Coldplay.
Why can't people stay together anymore?

I never paid her much attention either way until I found out her dad sold her phone call about her mom possibly overdosing (or something...). Imagine a completely vulnerable moment of your life captured, and your own blood sells it for profit...Tragic.

I just think about all the girls who went through Disney's meat grinder and came out totally fucked up on the other end: Britney, Lindsay, Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato, Miley Cyrus. Honestly, I blame their parents.

The whole thing just makes me sad. Though... Staaaaaaaaaaahp doing to whole "Poor Oprah" "Oprah thought she was better" "Oprah got played" bullshit. The Mighy Opes knows whats up. We are all netflixing, ondemanding, pirating, actually watching OWN... So? I mean, well done.

Mitch (left) has the voice of a goddamn angel. I just...I can't even. I'm not sure that I want to even.

I think "Uncle Terry" deliberately styles himself this way. Rapist chic?

I wonder if he cultivates that look on purpose or if that's just his natural state. He tries to shave in the morning and doesn't actually need glasses but two seconds later the beard is back and the glasses are on his face, like in that Santa Clause movie.

I want to know exactly what it says in his model releases. I worked in photo agencies a long time ago and my recollection is that releases basically say "I give permission for images of me to be used for profit-making purposes." Releases don't typically say "I give up all my human and civil rights and agree to…

For reals, I feel like he should be the picture definition for molester, pedophile, etc...

I have a friend who works on the editorial side at one of the publications in question (from the previous TR article today) and it's shocking what lengths she'll go to to cape for Richardson (along with her coworkers). She knows I'm a Jez reader, and in other life situations values my no-bullshit input on things, so…

I am 100% serious when I say this: whenever I see the words pedophile, pedo, stranger with candy, windowless van, and molester his face pops into my mind.

It amuses me that he submitted this to Page Six. Nothing like associating yourself with that pantheon of truth.