He’s inside his own head. And I have no data to back this up, so it’s probably a dumb idea, but I think he often starts slow and ends the year much stronger. He’s a classic neurotic overthinker from what I’ve heard of him personally, so this makes a lot of sense. And that so-autistic bat-leaning thing he was doing…

Joey Votto was doing WHAT with a log?

For not-together-parents, not soon enough. Hate calling her phone. One day, I’ll delete that contact.

No question, just a remark: recent baseball highlight headlines have brought warmth to my soul. I hope new heights exist and are reached.

This, and sometimes money helps with happiness, and if a shitty partner needs to be dropped, do that.

I was married to an awful japanese person for almost a decade, and got very good at cooking chopsticks. I use them for almost all kitchen stuff and of course for eating. No one will agree with me that they rock, and if some of you are my dad, you’ll assume I only use chopsticks to “look cool” and imply that in the…

I’m not ready for him to die until he starts eating people. Osha and I are unimpressed, even if I have to be unimpressed for her now.

I’m fairly sure Donald Trump is Bizarro-World Trump.

This new world is not one I want to live in.

The ‘dog raping the little boy’ Tom Ley mic drop is the light of my life.

Westbrook is an homicidal competitor in the same way that Michael Jordan was, I think. He doesn’t seem as calculated and annoying as Kobe Bryant was.

That was incredibly on-purpose.

I put another roll of TP on the back of the turlet just in case, every single time I have visitors. What kind of fucking lunatic lets the TP supply get too low when having someone over? For fuck’s sake, shouldn’t that be common courtesy?

I express my appreciation for this post, since for whatever reason, I can’t star anything.

Just fyi, you’ll change the whole fucking world for some few individuals who will never forget you. A young attorney with 5 kids who drove a 15 year old car to his office every day ensured my son would stay in my life a couple of years ago, and while I’m very, very happy I’m not paying him any longer, I won’t forget…

The airborn spasms kill me. 10/10 for style.

So, Russell Westbrook is an idiot dresser, right?

Had to, uh, clean myself off after that one.

The superstars, Stephen Curry and Michael Jordan, are nothing alike.

Deadspin shutting up about football for a minute might help football actually shut up.