Football is no longer my favorite sport.

As a mechanically-incompetent paranoid retard convinced everyone is screwing me any time I need any service, my game is pathetic. I could be calling the cops and screaming at people!

The old one where Beltre is on the mound and throws his glove at Elvis as Elvis jogs away laughing will never fucking ever stop being funny.

These Elvis/Adrian posts and disgusting baseball chins are what keep me going.

In the meantime, I’m totally lost. I don’t know where to go to be told what I’m thinking. WHO WILL PUT LEADING SOFTBALL QUESTIONS IN MY MOUTH?

Looks like Gray was asking some decent questions...for a subject that is entirely a waste of time...but let me skip lightly over that shit to ask this - I can’t be the only one who has chosen to loath Gray purely because he looks like a human weasel, right?

Danny...Tartabull?

Goddamn it, after getting genuinely pissed at the phrase “make a hit” like twelve times in the first 8 paragraphs, I just realized I’m both my company’s Baseball Guy and the YMCA sports person that needs a life reevaluation. *sigh* The first step is admitting it.

Utah resident here. The joke is that we few drinkers in the state make up for the non-drinkers. I probably don’t, but I appreciate a good 9% ABV “beer” and there are, for some reason, several great ones brewed in the state. Here’s where I’d identify them by name, except, uh, I’ve always been too busying drinking to…

THIS WHAT NASCAR SHOULD BE LIKE.

I mean, where’s the Beats by Dre?

The text of this article will live on for eternity in my hard drives and probably on paper. 420/10, Kerr, you magnificent human being.

I think the word “abuse” is substituted in for “use” too much, especially for less-addictive drugs like weed. I smoke about once a week. Is that “drug abuse”? Or “drug use”? When I smoke, I take 4-5 hits, enough to get baked out of my mind for a couple hours. Is that “abuse”? Or still just “use”?

Jim Abbot did that once. He never recovered.

I rode next to a guy wearing nothing on his feet except grime yesterday. Pretty common. I really miss all the drugs in Portland. Heroin smells awful though.

Pretty sure the voters rejected the MAX multiple times.

BARELY RELATED TANGENT: the light rail that was forced through by the filthy communists on the counsel in your city after trying and failing to get the public to vote for it (hi Portland!)...is barely used, clean, [relatively] fast, and cheap. Use it! Regular subway users would have heart attacks if they saw actual…

Drew, did you make a bracket of all the different playoffs for yourself? How did your bracket do when it was completed? Did you get 100%?

What in god’s name are you blathering about? A trial, drawn-out or otherwise, is where a verdict of guilty or innocent is reached.

*stares at photo, tries to imagine what's off-frame*