Woops, I just saw this! You nailed it — congrats! I actually looked at it with fresh eyes about a half-hour ago and came up with what you did (well, we differ on what he said after "seven" but the idea is the same). Also, I originally had "fucking two innings" as well.

A nickname he often gets is, "Balfour Rage"

Man, quiet crowd.

You're the first person in the history of the internet to notice that today's SNL can't hold a candle to what it was when you were in high school/70s "not ready for prime time" era. Good job.

Why so down on Pharoah's Obama? If you compare his to Armison's before it...I can't think of one thing the previous imitation brought to the table.

I guess it wouldn't be a Sunday without a Jet fumbling late and costing his team a game.

God damn I want an actual season of that.

Love it! The Shakespeare line is great!

You sound bitter. Not get into said safety school maybe?

Thee is no universe where that was a complete pass.

Actions of two women = Blame all women

Well at least one Jaguar is blocking something this year.

Nah b.

No, it would still be an unsportsmanlike tackling of a defender to earn a cheap penalty that he didn't deserve.

Yeah, they shouldn't call any penalties in DI football. If you don't like facemasking or late hits, go play INTRAMURALS. DI football is where any penalty, questionable or not, shows weakness and fear.

This fat guy return was short on yardage but long on happy. And fat guy returns never get old.

30 years ago Carl Yastrzemski was doing his farewell tour after 23 years with the Red Sox. The year before Yaz arrived in left field, his predecessor Teddy Ballgame became even more famous than he already was by hitting a home run in his last at-bat at Fenway. Those two were my favorite players as a child.

RT @JonHeymanCBS: How dare Todd Helton disrespect Mariano Rivera and have an awesome end to his career. #UnwrittenRules

Perfectenschlag

2 Team cities: Classy logo (ie: marriage)