What is it with his beard/hair?? I often LIKE beards, even the wispy kind... but for some reason, his comes with a palpable extra side of smug.

Phew, I was about to rage vomit! (Not at you, at the fashion industry for continually re-qualifying what they consider "too large to service"). Thanks for clarifying.

I'm confused, you aren't saying that you're plus-sized, are you? If size 8 is now plus sized, I'mma punch things.

I think I would only get super excited if I saw Matt Damon (my Movie Husband) or anyone from my Imaginary Celebrity BFFs/Poker Night Pals ensemble (Poehler, Fey, Jemaine Clement, Richard Ayoade, Chris O'Dowd, Charlize Theron).

Fair enough. Whatever your reasons, you don't owe me conversation, and I say that without an ounce of snark.

"You pinocchio fucking nose" may be too mean, but "Where's your name, bitch!?" is so awesomely bizarre that I will definitely file it away for future use.

Hmm, and here I thought we were having an interesting discussion. My mistake, evidently. Carry on.

I may not have the full definition, but I believe it is a woman strapping on a dildo and having anal sex with a man.

(N.B. sorry, Hermione, I give up on formatting, plz excuse any residual wonk)

(sorry. this html is spazzy on me, gimme a sec so it isn't SCREAMING at you...)

Really??? Okay, that's totally fascinating to me. I have friends who actually "write" that stuff, though, and have given me the scoop on a few, so I can't suspend my disbelief as easily. (There certainly used to be real moments at the start of the reality TV craze, but these days the majority of reality Tv is just…

That movie is chock full of great actors. And yet, whenever Kahn is on screen, I can see no one else. I genuinely miss the woman.

I EXPECTED BEAUTY.

And it's not like these women were Mata Haris. Much as I hate the concept of honey traps, what I hate even more is seeing evidence of how successful that approach could be with otherwise intelligent, even savvy, men* in power. Why does horny = stupid???

Yeah, I definitely tripped on the time she said "real women", as if porn stars had suddenly lost their humanity. With you on that, but I'm totally fine with the rest, i.e. I don't consider what I see on a pornographic film "real sex" simply because it was scripted, acted, and edited and the acts performed are…

Side note: what the fuck is with all the "spitting on crotches or in mouths" stuff in porn these days??

It's really hard to firmly say what I "won't, ever never" do. But, in general the stuff that seems very underwhelming to me:

Mr. Danger Weiner: in case you were curious, THIS is why you will (or at least should) lose your political career—

I am embarrassed to admit that I totally missed the major dickhead bonus-joke.