I’m just so disappointed that this article didn’t begin “Avril Lavigne isn’t dead--she’s born again.” It was RIGHT THERE! 

are you photo-shopping that image to be more red each time it gets posted? I swear...

I’d love to see him reveal his results on live TV:

Well done guys. Great article

You can repeat yourself as often as you like, and you’ll still be wrong.

You haven’t lived until you’ve seen Eli do the boot scoot boogie at halftime to rally the troops.

Imagine if we lived in a country where this could negatively impact a candidate?

Not like that.

I like Pete Davison, but talking about jerking off to your present girlfriend before you started dating her sounds a tad creepy.

Helluva weekend for detached heads in college mascots.

Humans were a mistake

Holy shit, Zephyr Teachout is a person?! I thought it was a pro-education organization. I really need to go back and reread the stuff from yesterday now.

The Belichick coaching tree sprouts another withered, lifeless branch.

Look, I’m a Lions fan so this sucks. But from a business perspective, if you’re moving your team to a whole new market that will require season ticket sales to, you know, build the fanbase, why wouldn’t you sign him to a long term contract? That guy should be on every Raiders billboard near the Las Vegas Strip for the…

For some reason, most of the time when I notice a vehicle doing that, it’s a Ford E-series van.

I really don’t understand the need to report specific actions in what are clearly the acute psychotic episodes of a person with mental illness and, in this case, compounded by grief. 

Every once in a while I consider joining Nextdoor or getting on the neighborhood list serv to meet new neighbors and get to know them better. Then I read something like this and remember that I'm fine with a head nod when we're bringing the garbage cans in together being the extent of our relationship.

The clearest message that I get out of WYTS every year is that attending an NFL game in person is a fucking horrible decision and only idiots do it.

At the rate these stories are coming out, we might as well squeeze the whole Big 10 in there. 

I’ll have you know that the Emerson football team has a sterling reputation going all the way back to 1880!