There are penises, and then there are dicks, like the roommate who constantly patted himself on the back for how feminist he was with one hand while filling every square of his privilege bingo card with the other, until my neighbor finally set up a GoFundMe to keep me from getting evicted next week. The campaign story …

My favorite strategy for dealing with a racist joke is to pretend I don’t get it and ask them to explain.

I went to see Phantom Menace with my ex. As we walked to the car, we tried to recall lines from the film, and this was quite literally the only thing we could quote. We quoted the first one all the way home.

I largely eschew social media, due to an old stalker and a constitutional aversion to selfies. So if anyone who sees this would be so kind as to share the GoFundMe my neighbor set up on my behalf so that I wouldn’t get evicted because of my chef roommate, I would really appreciate it. Please enjoy the adorable cat…

All the kids in Captain Fantastic were fantastic.

Here it is told by an Oscar-nominated filmmaker using Barbie Dolls.

Livestrong stopped funding actual research early on, and kept more dollars than were ever spent on outreach and awareness.

Livestrong stopped funding actual research early on, and kept more dollars than were ever spent on outreach and awareness.

Extortion, fraud, blackmail, just off the top of my head. He actively sought to destroy those who questioned him.

I know it’s not football, but the way he got tossed made me think that Divot would be an excellent name for a cat.

I can still remember the feeling in the pit of my belly when I first saw that.

The Barber of Seville overture is just automatically funny because of that.

And yet the men’s razors are usually better.

Not every woman knows about the pink tax, and even those who do often don’t know the extent of it. They’ll do things like use deceptive packaging to make a “woman’s” product cost far more per fluid ounce than the same formula in “men’s” packaging, for example. 

Your car reminds me of the BMW with 30-day tags that I saw parked illegally at the end of a block of slant-parked cars on NW 18th in Adams Morgan, blocking the curb cut and access to the handicapped space. As usual when confronted with vehicular asshattery, I wished for the power of psychokinesis, and went in the…

They’ve deliberately been starving education, public services, and infrastructure ever since Reagan, because that decreases civic engagement, which decreases voter turnout, which increases Republican power.

Fuck you, Bernie.

The problem in Venezuela is not socialism, it’s corruption.

Actually, I did say quite explicitly that he denied the existence of the levers, and that when confronted with evidence of their existence, he continued to deny their existence within his own orbit, saying they must just be on the West Coast rather than admit that he’d simply never noticed them. That was, in fact, the…

Yes, of course, but I’ve never been in a gas station that objected to you refilling your water bottle. The point was because he never noticed them, they didn’t exist.