Does his dick not work or something? Maybe he’s kinky in a really scary way? Is he secretly a huge asshole or abusive?

Translated for Trump supporter’s:

Oh, somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright;
the band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light,
and somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout;
but there is no joy at Mar a Lago - mighty Trumpy had crapped out.

No Ben Bailey?! I always had a weird crush on that guy- he was so sweet, even when the people gave the worst answers!

Screw it! If it doesn’t have Ben Bailey, who looks just like my brother, then I’m not watching.

Plot twist: the cab is actually an Uber, and the contestants are playing to determine whether or not the driver is going to get more than $0.50 in compensation.

Anyone who is appalled by the tone of this email is adorably inexperienced when it comes to receiving emails from the executive leadership down to middle management and below. The genre is always self-congratulatory and filled with ‘team wins’ that mean nothing to the recipients, but the execs feel like ‘sharing the…

“Just fuck me up, fam.”

Nope, for Dancers you say the French swear word “Merde”.

I can tell you with extreme confidence that he was not joking.

Is this beef overrated, underrated, or properly marinated?

“You can’t put lipstick on a pig,”

It’s the Annette Benning vs. Denise Richards debate. Women who fall in love with habitual womanizers often believe they’re going to be Annette Benning whereas they end up being the Denise Richards in the long run. The former is the rare reception (usually because the guy decides to settle down with whomever he’s with…