Mike, obviously.

Nothing better than a my-weather-app-is-better-than-yours beef at the ol’ ballpark. America’s pastime lives on.

He’s never been IN the black either.

The way it hit, went airborne, and landed reminds me of the Hamlin wreck at Fontana a couple years ago. May have injured his back in the same way too.

I have it on good authority that the Celtics were the team that asked him that question. I’m just hoping he gave them an answer without bias.

Derek Jeter: You haven’t lived until Betty White gives you the pleasure of a Grey Goose

Caps would’ve won if not for all the Penguin’s ILLEGAL GOALS. So many bad goals allowed by terrible (or sick) reffs! VERY UNFAIR !

I don’t know, popular cartoons have given us some conflicting reports on this topic...:

It’s a damn shaved samsquanch.

When you realize the article title isn’t some kind of metaphor...

That’s weird, Derrick Rose just tweeted Shady Acres Outpatient Rehabilitation Center followed by four knee brace emojis.

Well it’s important to look at both sides of the issue when making a choice about the statue.

Report: Jay Cutler’s New Job May Involve Apathetically Watching Football Games

The pineapple is just taunting you. Oh, you thought the rest of this meal was shit? What if we made it a Hawaiian pizza too?

Now I want to see Mitt Romney and Kid Rock get together and find something, anything in common besides being white dudes. I double dare them.

Shit, now the Orioles will have to protect their honor by drilling someone on Holbrook’s crew.

“Someone made me these shoes...”

Him and Nick are god damn national treasures.

I ranted about this in Slack, but what bothers me about these bullshit foul calls the most (because I am the kind of weirdo who thinks about things in these terms) is: They’re not penalizing defenders for breaking basketball rules. They’re affirmatively rewarding offensive players for successfully play-acting.