My recollection of it was more along the lines of "tricked her into going there" while in maybe Paris? Sort of a "hey, well, let's just check out this random place that I have no idea what it could be and WHADDYA KNOW, it's one of those totally non-creepy and not threatening clubs I've been desperately begging you to…

He traveled.

Shorter: me no like thing. Thing shouldn't exist. (Fling poo)

Shorter: me no like thing. Thing shouldn't exist. (Fling poo)

Additionally, and also, on the cast iron: if you have the young'uns, or a young'un on the way growing inside your good lady wife, then cast iron is a good way to cook your eggs, because a small but nutritionally significant amount of iron leeches off into the eggs themselves, which apparently means two eggs delivers…

Also, he traveled.

I think I speak for many when I say that the explanation "it's not about OSU" seems thin, at best. Obviously, no matter what school was reported on, it was going to be seen as an attack on that school and an attack on that program.

Yeah, it's bad that it didn't happen in Florida, because it might mean the Florida is spreading.

I chuckled.

Sorry, I think it's actually pretty good. I think the groupthink that has calcified around the idea that the show sucks comes from the fact that most of the people you hear yelling the loudest about how much it sucks are exactly the people that the show sends up/shames for not doing their jobs.

Goddammit, stop reminding me.

That was Colombia, but good effort anyway.

Is it wrong that I am openly rooting for a punter...any punter in the NFL, really, to blow out 19 ligaments in his knee so you can have a job again?

I call bullshit on the whole "Dusty didn't call for it" thing. He's known for doing this shit. He always does this shit. He...gah, I just can't anymore. Here's hoping whoever the Cardinals throw out there in the WC game pulls an Ankiel, it's really their only hope.

You can't replicate that level of humor, that was just a...a...one-time occurrence.

The Seahawks tried this in a playoff game against the Bengals in 1989. Didn't work, but the NFL told their next opponent not to even try it.

When visiting my parents (and bringing along the baby monitor from home because GODAMMIT MOM, THEY'RE LIKE $15 AT WALMART, YOU CAN'T LIGHTEN THE LOAD FOR THE MONTH OR TWO WE'RE HERE EVERY YEAR?") we picked up the neighbors fighting. Apparently, the kid napped in their bad every afternoon, so they went into his/her…

He may as well have asked me to fly a Harriet jet.