The opposing coach at my kid's last baseball game had the little brats banging on one of those "swing trainers" (ball on a long stick) the ENTIRE. FUCKING. GAME. Every inning, our third baseman asked "can you please stop that, or move farther away?" and the dickweed assistant coach said "no, we can't."

If that were the only problem with your comment, it'd be ok.

Not a video board. They will actually be tacking Adrian Peterson up to the wall to remind them of better days as they go 3-13 in the new digs.

This is pretty much what your whole life has been leading up to, isn't it?

Thank god this happened! I was really starting to worry that someone with a) a personality and b) a social conscience would survive in the Mark Schlereth dominated "DURRRR Distraction bad DURRR" world of the NFL.

Oh, right, the "it's ok that I'm a bigot because an imaginary man in the sky told me so and you can't call me a bigot because ZOMG the Romans mistreated my greatgreatgreatgreatgreatgreatgreatgreatgreat grandpappy."

Yes. Yes, it does. A really bad human being. Because, you know, judge not...

A wiener dog is actually a daschund. Nice try though.

Can't shake the feeling that all this "Geno's a baby for going home" (and the subsequent "way to take it like a man" when he changed course) would be muuuuuch different if he were a white guy. Then we'd get "DURRRR HE'S A FIERCE COMPETITOR FIRE AND PASSION DURRRRR."

As for what started it, look at the right hand side of the screen at about the :20 mark. #18 in blue looks like he's giving two guys the ol' "scoreboad looky loo," by which I mean he's making flourishy motions with his hand in an apparent attempt to remind them of the score of the contest.

I need Drew's swear-word bracket just to remind myself of all the words I'm thinking right now.

Can we talk about the celebratory slide, though? Needs work.

It looked to me like it hit him in the shoulder, but it's not entirely clear on my screen (stupid non-HD laptop). Did it maybe ricochet up into his head? Still...awful.

Oh, and believe me, I don't mind the trampoline dunking gorillas and the dancing mascots and the T-shirt cannons one little bit, it's just that even that little bit of down-time (as far as the game goes) distraction is usually decried as the end of civilization as we know it.

My guess is it's because we're taught from a very young age "you're not part of the show." You should just be sitting there eating your hot dog and watching the game and NOTHING ELSE. Hell, we still get 5 minute long dissertations on why you shouldn't even boo when your team sucks.

Why? Because back in my day, we…

Don't forget Joel Zumaya's "Guitar Hero" injury.

Aw jeez, leave it to the nerds to derail my enjoyment of EVERYTHING. Did you not see that guy's hustle and grit and grindy-ness?

Well, there was that one time when Judy Schachner went on a coke binge and posted an anti-Semitic rant on her Facebook page when Skippyjohn Jones didn't win a Caldecott Medal...

If this becomes a semi-regular feature with varying levels of pomposity, I'm on board with you.

Tomato, tomahto.