As a Lizard Person, Fiorina presumably has a cloaca.

I’m always blown away when these same women have several children.

Kristen Wiig is funny but she doesn’t get enough credit for her dramatic range.

guys hes not wrong

I AM UNCOMFORTABLE WITH REPETITION

The fact that he couldn’t recall the term “sapiosexual” is proof positive that he’s never actually been on Tinder. It is included in at least 85% of profiles.

People just wanted legal weed, right now, and didn't understand the consequences or how shitty the bill actually was. It created a cartel and was not good for Ohio as a whole.

I didn’t realize what a rip-off this bill was...now I’m kinda glad it failed.

It was a bad bill that was encouraging a cartel situation. We need legal marijuana, but not in this way. That's why people voted it down. Apparently, a better bill is in the works for 2016.

I’m still kind of confuzzled about how Anderson Cooper was really tough in the Democratic debate, but those candidates didn’t come out looking Scooby Doo villains bitching about meddling.

Oh, how convenient that the Telemundo debate is now off the table. I’m sure that has everything to with with mean old NBC and nothing at all to do with GOP candidates’ struggles to sound not-bigoted every single moment.

I had been hoodwinked, bamboozled, conned, duped, flimflammed.

This is every family goal I’ve ever had.

One of my dogs took a dump in my harp case. This is grosser than that.

My fav part about the duck dynasty dudes is that this look is just a gimmick. There's pictures of them from like 5 years ago where they just look like preppy country club boys

the duck dynasty dude telling other people what to wear makes me extremely happy

Not if you went to Catholic school ;)