Holy Mother of plastic surgery, Smokey Robinson! I'm sorry, but that goes well beyond "black don't crack." He's tucked so tight he looks like he's made of wax.

@AnnieSaBu: Us too! Well, we didn't have a specific day of the week for each song, but "Lift Every Voice" was in regular rotation. As I recall, though, "The Halls of Montezuma" was the hands-down favorite. No one liked "The Star Spangled Banner" because it's a bitch to sing.

@TheFormerJuneBronson: I have an ex or two on my FB friends list. Which is why I make sure my profile always makes my life sound FUN! and FABULOUS! I know one of the dudes is an inveterate FB obsesser, so I know he checks my page all the time.

@TheFormerJuneBronson: So true. Also, I would like to categorically state that there is nothing wrong with a little ex-stalking from time to time.

@emfish55: Well yeah. It goes without saying that we don't care when the fat and ugly chicks stay at home with their laptops. In fact, it's probably better that way.

@badmutha: Also, I get a hell of a lot of human contact through the interwebz.

Great! More paternalistic hand-wringing about how young women are making all the wrong choices and will wind up SAD and ALONE.

Kitteh sez: sleep with one eye open, hoomans.

I just wet myself.

@megnificent: I think they're more a side-effect of manopause.

"Moobs"

@HallelujahRIP: I love Cuba, but it's not an easy place to live, what with the rationing of food, scarcity of medicine and dissenter-imprisoning Communist dictatorship.

@Plate2.18: She would have been 29 when WWI started. Do you really consider that old?

@LaFemme: That is a great idea!

Okay, the heels thing I get. I once came WAY too close to driving off the side of a heavily wooded hill in rural Virginia because I was wearing high heels while driving (the heel got stuck in the floor mat and I only barely managed to free my foot and stomp on the brakes in time).

@gimme_that_headband: Sucker!

@morninggloria: WORD. She serves the same function as the chicks on "Rock of Love Tour Bus" for me—a constant, comforting reminder of how well-adjusted I actually am.

If Mama ain't happy, ain't NO ONE happy.

@SarahMC: SATIRE: noun, (Early 16th century. Directly or via French < Latin satira "poetic medley): a form of literary expression wherein dudebros get to say whatever offensive shit they want, without chicks getting all bitchy and whatnot.

@SomeAuthorGirl: True. But if you know going in that he doesn't believe in fidelity, and, in fact, won't commit to being faithful...it's not logical or realistic to expect fidelity in the future. This is a classic case of being presented with the facts, and willfully ignoring them in the hopes that they'll change.