This is a story of how one of the worst days of my life ended up reaffirming my faith in strangers and in the human race in general.

Who typed that last part?

I have to say, the older I get, the younger everyone else looks. I think 24 year olds are 17. I think 17 year olds are 12.

If you are picking up women at a playground, probably best to ask their age.

That photoshop isn't even trying

No problem with the rape content, but "gay stuff?! Ew!"

Dear State of Arkansas: file child abuse charges against these scumbags posthaste, because isolating a child for hours on end IS abuse.

Hey, can't prosecute them for their sincerely held religious beliefs, guys.

Every single time I read something like this I immediately get myself pregnant just so I can have an abortion.

And to those people I say: My mom went out with my dad because she wanted to meet my dad's roommate. He badgered her into dating him. He had to badger her into marrying him.

They fucking hate each other. It sounds romantic from the outside, but it is not. cute. up. close.

If corporations are truly people, McDonald's is the guy who takes five ones on the table at the start of the meal, announces that it's the tip, and pockets one for every time the waiter's groveling is insufficient.

Shea butter or coconut butter make for the best lip balms. Most of the lip balms out there have alcohol, which dries lips.

Shea butter or coconut butter make for the best lip balms. Most of the lip balms out there have alcohol, which dries…

Right here: Fresh Sugar lip balm. Moisturizing, smooth, SPF 15 and comes in several colours (including clear). Free of parabens, sulfates and phthalates. Screw-on cap keeps it from opening in your pocket/bag.

Right here: Fresh Sugar lip balm. Moisturizing, smooth, SPF 15 and comes in several colours (including clear). Free…

The blood of a human male.

The blood of a human male.

It is only maternal love that stops you from dropping your toddler off in a basket on a neighbor's doorstep when they bite you in the ass. Well, that, and they wouldn't stay in a basket for three seconds.

My husband was sitting at our kitchen table, working on his laptop and speaking to me. I stood by the table, completely ignoring my toddler because what my husband was saying was more important than "hi! hi! hi! hi! no?"

Yeah, you also learn not to set your kid down in places where they can't be seen, lest this very thing happen. I'm still learning to visually locate my kid before I turn around in the kitchen because she sneaks up on me and stands directly behind my knees. I have kicked her by accident more than once.

I have the feeling that there are enough Iron Shiek stories out there to do a BCO just on him. He's like the definition of performance art.

SHEIK TAKE DOWN JABRONI SALAD BAR AND GIVE CHICKEN RESTAURANT A CAMEL CLUTCH.