Help, my console is bricked.

What an enormous doucher. Everything from the way he dresses to the designer furniture that is on the stage for some reason to the way he can only manage to say a few snide words at a time in between his condescending pauses, it all screams doucher. Say what you will about Notch, but at least he isn't this guy.

The delay for AC is understandable. There'll be women in the movie, and they take longer to render.

Roger Goodell would be proud

I would anticipate a 1-game suspension because a child is about half the size of a woman.

Hey, it's not pirated, it's the The Sims 4: Minecraft Edition.

Only 30%? I was under the impression he was halfway there

"Keeping him out of team activities" is the new "two game suspension."

Grossi is also confused by the growing trend of Selfies, which he remembers fondly from all the time he spent in the bathroom in his teen years.

Rob Ford holds groin after running into a fire hydrant during celebrations: http://bit.ly/1moJnbv

Imaginary Girlfriends Are The Best

Feldman's lucky. Had he gone home with the Payday, Zimmerman might've murdered him.

Despite not being in any sort of physical danger, Zimmerman still plans to shoot DMX.

Don't worry too much about Bargnani. I'm sure he'll rebound from this.

My conspiracy theory is that Steam has become self-aware and is testing its limitations.

Go after yourselves!

Look out Orange Crush pop! They're coming for you next!

Sounds legit.

I'm sure Bill has seen at least 1 worse play in the thousands of hours of Jets practice he has watched.